You hold MY GIRL.......
18 August, 2013
22 July, 2013
Embarrassing Dreams
It take me 1 hour each way on the train to my office every morning. The one thing that keeps me entertained is all the people falling asleep in embarrassing positions every morning. Then waking up with shock when they realise they look retarded LOL
Then this morning it happened to me!!! I woke up with a shock and found my head resting on an old mans shoulder LOL!! Thank gawd I wasn't dribbling... haha. Fair dinkum I'm a dead set SUPERSTAR lol
Hehehe. Damn ;-)
21 July, 2013
Why?
G'day world, how are ya'all tonight :-) So I was just on Google, and found this amazing song... by RASCALL FLATTS. It really made me think... it's a very powerful song with a strong message.
You know, I remember 10 years ago, I was happily married, had 2 dogs, an awesome house that I had built for my wife that we both loved, and a garden that was my pride and joy. I had everything!! Then all that changed in the space of 2 weeks. My wife cheated on me, and we separated. Then I had to sell my house. One week after that, one of my dogs Rocky became sick, and he died. I was totally heartbroken. Everything that I loved in my life was taken away. It was just me and Tex left. He was everything I owned.
I remember clearly, the day I had to move out of my house... I was sitting outside my house with Tex. He was the only thing I had left. And I remember thinking... how can I ever build my life up again. I had nothing anymore. I didn't even know how I would survive the next day. I didn't know what to do!! I'm not a religious man... for sure with all my sins a church would collapse if I ever walked inside LOL. But at this moment, I remember looking up at the sky and asking God for a sign... a sign that somehow everything would be okay.
Then... without reason... this damn butterfly came flying down... and it landed on Tex's nose!!! It just stayed there, and didn't move. Tex was so surprised .. but he didn't try to eat it. He just looked at this butterfly, sitting on his nose... and he went cross eyed LOL!!! It's the only time in my life I have seen a cross eyed dog haha!! It was effin' impossible not to laugh... and that is when I knew... some-how, some-way, everything will be okay. I just had to find things that made me laugh. I had to fight to get my life back again. And I was never gonna give up on that. Sometimes you just have to trust life, ya know. When I lost everything... a simple butterfly came to save my life!!!
Now my life is amazing... I live in paradise at Phuket, have a dream job, and get to travel the world. So where do I go for holidays... LOL... well thats the best part!!! I get to return home to beautiful Sydney to visit my family and friends. All because a butterfly angel decided to land on Mr Tex's nose!!
Life is ALWAYS worth the FIGHT.
You know, I remember 10 years ago, I was happily married, had 2 dogs, an awesome house that I had built for my wife that we both loved, and a garden that was my pride and joy. I had everything!! Then all that changed in the space of 2 weeks. My wife cheated on me, and we separated. Then I had to sell my house. One week after that, one of my dogs Rocky became sick, and he died. I was totally heartbroken. Everything that I loved in my life was taken away. It was just me and Tex left. He was everything I owned.
I remember clearly, the day I had to move out of my house... I was sitting outside my house with Tex. He was the only thing I had left. And I remember thinking... how can I ever build my life up again. I had nothing anymore. I didn't even know how I would survive the next day. I didn't know what to do!! I'm not a religious man... for sure with all my sins a church would collapse if I ever walked inside LOL. But at this moment, I remember looking up at the sky and asking God for a sign... a sign that somehow everything would be okay.
Then... without reason... this damn butterfly came flying down... and it landed on Tex's nose!!! It just stayed there, and didn't move. Tex was so surprised .. but he didn't try to eat it. He just looked at this butterfly, sitting on his nose... and he went cross eyed LOL!!! It's the only time in my life I have seen a cross eyed dog haha!! It was effin' impossible not to laugh... and that is when I knew... some-how, some-way, everything will be okay. I just had to find things that made me laugh. I had to fight to get my life back again. And I was never gonna give up on that. Sometimes you just have to trust life, ya know. When I lost everything... a simple butterfly came to save my life!!!
Now my life is amazing... I live in paradise at Phuket, have a dream job, and get to travel the world. So where do I go for holidays... LOL... well thats the best part!!! I get to return home to beautiful Sydney to visit my family and friends. All because a butterfly angel decided to land on Mr Tex's nose!!
Life is ALWAYS worth the FIGHT.
07 June, 2013
Ultimate Traveller
Astronauts are the Ultimate Travellers... they have explored about as far 'off the beaten track' as one can possibly get. So when people often ask me if there was ONE place I could visit that I haven't already been, where would I go? The answer is easy- the MOON!!
Why? Not cus I want to see the moon, but cus I want to see EARTH viewed from the moon. You see, when I first started travelling, it was always about visiting the famous sights. But as I travelled more and more... the reaIisation set in that all the amazing travel memories I had were from the spirited people I'd encountered along the way. It virtually forced me to open my eyes and see our planet for what it really is. A huge mix of humanity, of wonderful people living both extraordinary rich, and desperately poor lives. But the ONE common denominator is we all live on the same blue globe we call EARTH. Travel forces you to change your thinking. And it does. Believe me. So to ya' all who say "Hey Australia is your home, you should be proud of it". My response-
"The EARTH is my home... and yes I am very proud of it".
When mankind first dared to dream about visiting the MOON, it was all about the MOON... the ultimate sightseeing tour. A place like no other on EARTH. A lunar landscape that our astronaut's thought would be the most amazing sight one could ever see. But when they blasted off into space and finally set foot on the MOON... they discovered the most amazing sight was not the lunar landscape in front of them... but what was behind them. The EARTH. Astronaut's have not just travelled the world, they have seen the world as ONE... without borders and prejudice. I'll leave you all with a few quotes from Astronaut's-
"As we got further and further away, the Earth diminished in size. Finally it shrank to the size of a marble, the most beautiful you can imagine. That beautiful, warm, living object looked so fragile, so delicate, that if you touched it with a finger it would crumble and fall apart. Seeing this has to change a man." -James B. Irwin, Apollo 8
"Once a photograph of the Earth, taken from the outside, is available, a new idea as powerful as any in history will be let loose." -Sir Fred Hoyle
"When you're finally up at the Moon looking back on Earth, all those differences and nationalistic traits are pretty well going to blend, and you're going to get a concept that maybe this really is one world and why the hell can't we learn to live together like decent people."
-Frank Borman, Apollo 8
"If somebody'd said before the flight, "Are you going to get carried away looking at the Earth from the Moon?" I would have say, "No, no way." But yet when I first looked back at the Earth, standing on the Moon, I cried." -Alan Shepard, Apollo 12
"We came all this way to explore the Moon, and the most important thing is that we discovered the Earth." -William Anders, Apollo 14
"It suddenly struck me that that tiny pea, pretty and blue, was the Earth. I put up my thumb and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth. I didn't feel like a giant. I felt very, very small." -Neil Armstrong, Apollo 8
"We learned a lot about the Moon, but what we really learned was about the Earth. The fact that just from the distance of the Moon you can put your thumb up and you can hide the Earth behind your thumb. Everything that you've ever known, your loved ones, your business, the problems of the Earth itself—all behind your thumb. And how insignificant we really all are, but then how lucky we are to have this planet and to be able to enjoy loving here amongst the beauty of the Earth itself." -Jim Lovell, Apollo 8 & 13
"I think the one overwhelming emotion that we had was when we saw the Earth rising in the distance over the lunar landscape . . . . It makes us realize that we all do exist on one small globe. For from 230,000 miles away it really is a small planet." -Frank Borman, Apollo 8
"Oddly enough the overriding sensation I got looking at the Earth was, my god that little thing is so fragile out there."-Mike Collins, Apollo 11
"The Earth is tiny out there...it's inconsequential. It's ironic that we had come to study the Moon and it was really discovering the Earth." -Bill Anders, Apollo 8
"The Moon was a sobering sight, but it didn't have the impact on me, at least, as the view of the Earth did." -Frank Borman, Apollo 8
"Now I know why I'm here. Not for a closer look at the moon, but to look back at our home, the Earth." -Alfred Worden, Apollo 12
"The first day on the Moon... we all pointed to our countries. The third or fourth day we were pointing to our continents. By the fifth day, we were aware of only one Earth." -Sultan bin Salman, Apollo 14
"You develop an instant global consciousness, a people orientation, an intense dissatisfaction with the state of the world, and a compulsion to do something about it. From out there on the moon, international politics look so petty. You want to grab a politician by the scruff of the neck and drag him a quarter of a million miles out and say, "Just look at that, you son of a bitch." -Edgar Mitchell, Apollo 14
My HOME :-)
Why? Not cus I want to see the moon, but cus I want to see EARTH viewed from the moon. You see, when I first started travelling, it was always about visiting the famous sights. But as I travelled more and more... the reaIisation set in that all the amazing travel memories I had were from the spirited people I'd encountered along the way. It virtually forced me to open my eyes and see our planet for what it really is. A huge mix of humanity, of wonderful people living both extraordinary rich, and desperately poor lives. But the ONE common denominator is we all live on the same blue globe we call EARTH. Travel forces you to change your thinking. And it does. Believe me. So to ya' all who say "Hey Australia is your home, you should be proud of it". My response-
"The EARTH is my home... and yes I am very proud of it".
When mankind first dared to dream about visiting the MOON, it was all about the MOON... the ultimate sightseeing tour. A place like no other on EARTH. A lunar landscape that our astronaut's thought would be the most amazing sight one could ever see. But when they blasted off into space and finally set foot on the MOON... they discovered the most amazing sight was not the lunar landscape in front of them... but what was behind them. The EARTH. Astronaut's have not just travelled the world, they have seen the world as ONE... without borders and prejudice. I'll leave you all with a few quotes from Astronaut's-
"As we got further and further away, the Earth diminished in size. Finally it shrank to the size of a marble, the most beautiful you can imagine. That beautiful, warm, living object looked so fragile, so delicate, that if you touched it with a finger it would crumble and fall apart. Seeing this has to change a man." -James B. Irwin, Apollo 8
"Once a photograph of the Earth, taken from the outside, is available, a new idea as powerful as any in history will be let loose." -Sir Fred Hoyle
"When you're finally up at the Moon looking back on Earth, all those differences and nationalistic traits are pretty well going to blend, and you're going to get a concept that maybe this really is one world and why the hell can't we learn to live together like decent people."
-Frank Borman, Apollo 8
"If somebody'd said before the flight, "Are you going to get carried away looking at the Earth from the Moon?" I would have say, "No, no way." But yet when I first looked back at the Earth, standing on the Moon, I cried." -Alan Shepard, Apollo 12
"We came all this way to explore the Moon, and the most important thing is that we discovered the Earth." -William Anders, Apollo 14
"It suddenly struck me that that tiny pea, pretty and blue, was the Earth. I put up my thumb and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth. I didn't feel like a giant. I felt very, very small." -Neil Armstrong, Apollo 8
"We learned a lot about the Moon, but what we really learned was about the Earth. The fact that just from the distance of the Moon you can put your thumb up and you can hide the Earth behind your thumb. Everything that you've ever known, your loved ones, your business, the problems of the Earth itself—all behind your thumb. And how insignificant we really all are, but then how lucky we are to have this planet and to be able to enjoy loving here amongst the beauty of the Earth itself." -Jim Lovell, Apollo 8 & 13
"I think the one overwhelming emotion that we had was when we saw the Earth rising in the distance over the lunar landscape . . . . It makes us realize that we all do exist on one small globe. For from 230,000 miles away it really is a small planet." -Frank Borman, Apollo 8
"Oddly enough the overriding sensation I got looking at the Earth was, my god that little thing is so fragile out there."-Mike Collins, Apollo 11
"The Earth is tiny out there...it's inconsequential. It's ironic that we had come to study the Moon and it was really discovering the Earth." -Bill Anders, Apollo 8
"The Moon was a sobering sight, but it didn't have the impact on me, at least, as the view of the Earth did." -Frank Borman, Apollo 8
"Now I know why I'm here. Not for a closer look at the moon, but to look back at our home, the Earth." -Alfred Worden, Apollo 12
"The first day on the Moon... we all pointed to our countries. The third or fourth day we were pointing to our continents. By the fifth day, we were aware of only one Earth." -Sultan bin Salman, Apollo 14
"You develop an instant global consciousness, a people orientation, an intense dissatisfaction with the state of the world, and a compulsion to do something about it. From out there on the moon, international politics look so petty. You want to grab a politician by the scruff of the neck and drag him a quarter of a million miles out and say, "Just look at that, you son of a bitch." -Edgar Mitchell, Apollo 14
My HOME :-)
15 May, 2013
14 February, 2013
Made For Each Other...
Two of my closest friends... Quinny and Betsy... are about to tie the knot back home in Australia. And I couldn't be more proud of them both... this little blog is serving as a good luck message as unfortunately I can't be there for their special day.
Which is probably a good thing for both of them... as after spending many nights travelling with them in the Philippines... I know all their embarrassing stories from travelling in the holiday spirit. But wedding speeches are traditionally embarrassing for the bride and groom right?? So guys... if you thought I was gonna let either of you off lightly here... think again hehe ;-) In fact, I have a photo of Quinny snoring on the sofa at our Cebu Hotel foyer... don't worry mate I'll save you the torture ;-) And I'm sure Betsy would already be giggling at the very thought of THAT photo appearing on this BLOG hehe LOL ;-) But that's a testament to the amazing couple they are... they can laugh at each other like best mates do... but underneath that is a deep love and respect that I have personally witnessed over the last year.
When Quinny first told me about Betsy... I was still in Sydney at the time, and had no idea what to expect when I met her a few days later. The moment I saw them together... 2 things became clear-
1) They had something unique and very special together.
2) Betsy was on the happy gas.
Well it didn't take long to discover Betsy's bubbly personality and infectious laugh was genuine & something that lights up a room. And never had I seen Quinny so happy... the more I got to know them as a couple, the more it became apparent that they were made for each other like Strawberry & Cream. Or in our case... Vodka &^ Red Bull.
Anyway I wish you both the very best of luck for the wedding. I truly wish I was there to help you celebrate. You are both wonderful friends to me personally, wonderful people and I'm grateful you are both in my life. You are both lucky to have each other. So enjoy the big day guys... and look forward to spending the rest of your lives together. And you know what that means... well for you Betsy it means enduring another 875,000 individual snores. And for you Quinny... it means enduring another 875,000 individual photos. Gawd help ya mate LOL ;-)
In all seriousness... I love YA BOTH. And wish you nothing but all the happiness and love in the world :-)
Which is probably a good thing for both of them... as after spending many nights travelling with them in the Philippines... I know all their embarrassing stories from travelling in the holiday spirit. But wedding speeches are traditionally embarrassing for the bride and groom right?? So guys... if you thought I was gonna let either of you off lightly here... think again hehe ;-) In fact, I have a photo of Quinny snoring on the sofa at our Cebu Hotel foyer... don't worry mate I'll save you the torture ;-) And I'm sure Betsy would already be giggling at the very thought of THAT photo appearing on this BLOG hehe LOL ;-) But that's a testament to the amazing couple they are... they can laugh at each other like best mates do... but underneath that is a deep love and respect that I have personally witnessed over the last year.
When Quinny first told me about Betsy... I was still in Sydney at the time, and had no idea what to expect when I met her a few days later. The moment I saw them together... 2 things became clear-
1) They had something unique and very special together.
2) Betsy was on the happy gas.
Well it didn't take long to discover Betsy's bubbly personality and infectious laugh was genuine & something that lights up a room. And never had I seen Quinny so happy... the more I got to know them as a couple, the more it became apparent that they were made for each other like Strawberry & Cream. Or in our case... Vodka &^ Red Bull.
Anyway I wish you both the very best of luck for the wedding. I truly wish I was there to help you celebrate. You are both wonderful friends to me personally, wonderful people and I'm grateful you are both in my life. You are both lucky to have each other. So enjoy the big day guys... and look forward to spending the rest of your lives together. And you know what that means... well for you Betsy it means enduring another 875,000 individual snores. And for you Quinny... it means enduring another 875,000 individual photos. Gawd help ya mate LOL ;-)
In all seriousness... I love YA BOTH. And wish you nothing but all the happiness and love in the world :-)
Happy Traveller Emails: YaYa (Part 1)
Isn't it funny how 1 or 2 insignifcant moments can literally... change your life. Ive always wondered where my life would be today if SHE wasn't working the day I walked past... or if I didn't happen to glance across the road... and if SHE didnt happen to look up. But SHE did. And I did. And it changed my life forever. Fate? Destiny?
I like to call it the way things are supposed to be...
Anyone who knows me... knows YaYa to one degree or another. But only my 2 absolute closests friends know the full story. Ive decided to BLOG it for may reasons... because it’s such a big part of why my life is where it is now... because I think its a story worth telling... and because somebody said to me the other day they're giving up on love.
Its uncut and unedited... apart from the photos Ive added and names + emails have been withheld to protect the guilty ;-)
Date: Wed 23 July 2008, 3:02pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: Welcome to Phuket
Hey ya'll...
Landed in Phuket last night from Chiang Mai... business class on Thai Airways WOOT!!! Makes a nice change from stewardesses screaming in my ear LOL.
This place is completely insane… my heads still spinning. Started off normal enough with a mini bus transfer from Phuket airport with 3 ladyboys, 2 gay Arabs and a surfer from Hawaii. Got to my hotel at 11pm and the city was crawling with freaks!! And the occasional person... so decided I'd check out the nightlife.
OMG there was everything from drunk Aussie guys walking around in nappies (WTF?) to Thai girls hugging 80 year old men. Plus it appears to be normal here to squeeze as many people onto a motorbike as possible... I saw one with 5!!!! They were sitting on each others shoulders hahaha. Oh and of course the highlight of the night had to have been getting grabbed on the nuts by an attractive Thai girl only to have *her* say in a deep voice... you want some lovin darlin! Faaark what is going on here!!!
So I went to bed confused lol... then this morning go outside again and get swarmed by street sellers trying to sell me a suit... then the Tuk-Tuk drivers constantly asking me if I need any drugs!! Freakin hell... must have said "no thanks mate" 20 times within the first 10 minutes of stepping out my hotel. Then... just after I thought everything was normal... I get bombed with cries of "hellooow massaaaaage" from across the street from all these beautiful Thai massage girls LOL!! Hmmm I must admit the massage girls got more attention than the Tuk-Tuk drivers hehehe. But there was this one particular massage girl who was dead set beautiful... she had long wavy hair and a smile that lit up from across the road. I might just 'accidently' be on her side of the street when I walk back to my hotel tonight LOL
Just booked some tours... going snorkelling 2moz... then Phi Phi Island in a few days. Tonight I was thinking about going to see the Muay Thai Kickboxing. Anyhow... I'm in this internet cafe trying to escape the chaos... gonna go get myself into trouble now hehe.
Chat soon...
Date: Thu 24 July 2008, 10:04pm
To: me@hotmail.com
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Mate watch those ladyboys LOL. Are they an easy pick??? If anyone was gonna accidently take home a girl with hairy nuts it would be U... LOL it would be the greatest Rodd Story of all time LMAO
Im pissing myself laughing even thinking about it....
Date: Fri 25 July 2008, 11:55am
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Mate their 6 foot height and fake boobs is a give away. But some are petite and slim, plus look really natural. I'm buggered if I know LOL...
Hey I met that massage girl I was talking about in my last email.. walking back from the beach. I totally forgot about her to be honest until I hear the 'hellooow massage' cries again LOL. And out of the 20 odd massage girls at her shop... guess who steps out with her arms spread out to stop me from walking past... yeah HER. Im thinking cool that’s gotta be a sign LOL so go for a massage.
We go inside, she says "ok get undressed and I back 2 minutes I go get changed". So WTF does that mean haha??! So I take everything off... but kept my Calvin Klein undies on right... cus honestly I have no idea if this is a normal massage like we get in Australia or some seedy sex massage. Anyway, so she returns now devoid of the traditional Thai dress she was wearing on the street... now she is wearing hot pink beach shorts. We're getting acquainted with some light chat... about family and blah blah. Then she takes my towel off... and sees that I'm still wearing my Calvin Klein undies lol... she playfully says "ooooh you shy man you not take everything off" LOL friggin hell!! I stutter out "just massage... back shoulders and legs thanks". Then she starts joking about me being gay... since I didn't take everything off LOL. Was quiet a funny experience. Actually ended up being one of the best massages I've ever had... not to hard but not too soft... probably a good description for a few things ;-)
And NO... no happy ending. But YES... that option was clearly made available to me. Shit I cant even remember her name... think she said it was Oy... or maybe Oy Ya... LOL who knows maybe I'll just call her Miss Massage hehe
Date: Sat 26 July 2008, 9:21pm
To: me@hotmail.com
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Hey tried calling U yesterday... U didn't answer... probably still lovin all the attention from these exotic sounding Thai chicks... lucky bastard. When U comin back eh...
Faaaark me... sounds like my kind of massage LMAO. Might have to have a chat to *** tonight about moving me entire family over there LOL... no wait Id end up divorced in 3 days LMAO.
Date: Sun 27 July 2008, 11:04am
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Last night I returned for another massage... its only like 200 baht ($8!) mate as if Im not gonna have one every day haha!! Her name is not Oy Ya... its YaYa.
She's keeps trying to get me for a happy handing... honestly mate I dont think too many guys say no to her. She's real flirty and playful... but she aint getting me... not like THAT anyway.
When we walked back downstairs all the other masseuses’ were looking at me giggling... LOL friggin hell nothing even happened... and YaYa was just kinda looking over at them with raised eyebrows and a surprised smirk as if to say nope I still didn't get him LMAO.
I gotta say... she has these amazing eyes... well she has amazing everything LOL... but her eyes... heeeey ya... you'd love em... the deep and soulful type.
Gawd I'm in love hehehehehe
Date: Mon 28 July 2008, 7:34pm
To: me@hotmail.com
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
You've got a thing for this girl don't U... as soon as U start crappin on eyes and stuff... thats when I know... so confess up already biatch!!! I want details!!!
Or have U been abducted by ladyboys again LMAO???
Date: Tue 29 July 2008, 7:02pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Hey bud...
Yeah I do like her a bit... there is just something about this girl. But at the end of the day... I live in Sydney and she live here in Phuket... so love can never happen buddy. Anyway can you honestly imagine me ever having a Thai GF... hahaha yeah right!!!!
You're seriously not gonna believe what happened to me last night... I got invited by YaYa to a PRIVATE party at the massage place... it was one of the other girls birthdays at the shop. And there were 16... yep count them 16 beautiful Thai massage girls plus me haha! Gold! It was an awesome night too... chilling out with YaYa and her friends. So the night is starting to wind down... the mood is good so I take a gamble and ask YaYa if she wants to stay me for the night. At first she said she can't cus she needs to go home with her friends. So ok, fair enough.... ego slightly dented I say "thanks for a nice night" and start walking off. Didn't even reach the footpath before I hear "W-A-I-T" ... and turn around to see YaYa standing there with a smile... "how big is your bed" she jokes LOL hahaha!! So I'm like "its big enough for 2, you can kick your legs around as much as you want". She laughs and says "ok I need to tell my friend where I go so they not worry". Cool so she is giggling and talking to her friends in Thai... they're all looking at me... and gigglin some more LOL. Mate it was like an episode of Seinfeld hahaha. As we're leaving her friend whispers in my ear "look after her she a good girl ok". So YaYa takes my hand and we start walking home. And thats all I'm giving you CAVEMAN...
You'll have to use your imagination to fill in the blanks;-) WOOOT!!!
I'm gonna go back up to see her a little later... see how she's holding up after last night. If shes still talking to me that is... I had to kick us both out of bed at 8am because of that Phi Phi Island tour Id already booked... felt a bit bad couldn't even buy her breakfast hehe. Mate she's an awesome chick... you'd really like her yeah.
This place has really grown on me eh... I had a real interesting conversation with a Thai man today about working here... will tell you about it when I get back. Flying out tomorrow.
Stay safe mate
On the plane coming home... for some reason I couldn't stop thinking about this exotic Thai massage girl I had met. I didn't have her phone number... so when I got back to Sydney I got a photo developed of myself and YaYa together in Phuket... and made it in a nice timber frame... then paid my local Thai restaurant $20 to translate a note I'd written her into Thai for me. I put the note and the photo in a box and sent it off to YaYa's work. I didn't even know if she would ever receive it.
Then 3 months later... I got my hands on a 1 year Thai working VISA, quit my job at Flight Centre and headed back over to SE Asia... and Thailand again...
Received: Tue 21 October 2008, 10:21am
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: YaYa
Ok that SMS went to 4 people only: ***, ***, ***** and YOU!!! So stop crying love… bloody female drama queens ;-)
Hey I walked up to YaYa’s work last night... she wasn’t there. All the other girls remembered me though... it seems the photo and little note I sent was a big hit... they couldnt stop saying how sweet it was LOL!! HaHa I cant believe she actually got it!!! Although thought I overheard one of them saying YaYa was in Ko Samui with a boyfriend... hopefully I misheard.
Ive been a bit crook last coupla days... must have been those fried mosquitoes I ate (Im not joking). You’re prob killing yourself laughing thinking its the Vanuatu peanut situation all over again hehehe.
Anyhoo... gotta do a big groupie email now.
Sputz
Date: Wed 22 October 2008, 2:37pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Are you sure it's not Malaria again… peanuts can give you a bad case of that… but if you’ve been eating mosquitoes (WTF??) then you’d have it for sure lol.
If Miss YaYa does have a boyfriend, it's not like you've started this amazing relationship (yet) and at least no hearts will be broken... perhaps just a dented ego.
By the way what is it with you using my name ****?? Shit… reminds me of when I was in trouble as a kid... my mum would say **** with tone. Grrrrr
Hurry up and get married so I can book my trip to Thailand...
Jxxx
Received: Thu 23 October 2008, 6:55pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Im ok now… must have only been a mild case of Malaria. Maybe she does have a boyfriend now... I really dunno. Can’t seem to get a straight answer out of anyone re her whereabouts. But just quietly it will be a bit more than a dented ego if it turns out she does. What is it about this girl... FRIG why am I so nervous to see her again???
I think she may be back here now. If she’s not then the weddings off GOD DAMMIT ;-)
You know what… Im gonna have a shower and wander up there now.
ME
Date: Fri 24 October 2008, 9:32am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey have you seen your Thai princess yet?? Does she have the BF in tow or not??
Just got some of your photo's... how did you get such good photos of the KL tower at night... the lights kept reflecting off mine.
So when do you start working you beach bum... and what is this about Vietnam... I'll kill you if you get there before me...
Jxxx
PS: My Mum was "tickled pink" to get a postcard from you:
“Lots of love to you"… quoted from herself.
Date: Tue 28 October 2008, 7:02pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Goodays me lovely.
Guess what… FINALLY saw YaYa last night. I was walking up towards her work and from a
distance could see this tallish girl with long wavy hair standing out the front... I knew it was her straight away. And she's every bit as stunning as I remember her to be hehe ;-)
She was COMPLETELY shocked to see me too… you should've seen the look on her face... she loved the photo and note... even showed it too me... she kept it all this time in her locker at work!! Anyhoo... heres her scoop... its kinda complicated. Apparently this rich dude from Europe appeared on the scene after I left in July… he took her to Ko Samui last week (hence why she was never at work) but YaYa says he's not a BF. In her words:
"a little bit more than a customer"
LOL ... LOL ... LOL ... LOL
haven't heard that one before.
as clear as mud right :-s
Basically dunno what the fucks going on LOL…
Mr Me
Date: Wed 29 October 2008, 9:05am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
haha hahahaha. Only a Thai girl could say that.
You're having way too much fun, why don't you get a real life that involves going to work each day and doing the same boring monotonous office crap. You might enjoy it... not. I think after what you put up with at Flight Centre... you earnt you this little working vacation
Just got your other groupie email... I had to laugh at the part where you got fined for not having a helmut but they let you continue riding home drunk????
Since when have you been able to ride a Moped anyway Mr Smith??
Jxxx
Sent: Fri 31 October 2008, 8:33pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey Hey :-) I bloody CANT ride a moped... hence why I was only doing 20km/h... its only a short trip from the Open Bar to where all our rooms are. And i was the LEAST drunk out of me Gai and Kung so i rode us all back hehe
Having quiet a cruisy time with Miss YaYa... I must say. Still have no idea what the hell is going on LOL. She hasn't given up on trying to get me to pay for a happy ending LOL… I think she knows I'm not that type of guy. But she keeps trying to make me weak with these seductive massages. I haven't given in yet but it’s become a running joke between us now. We've been having some funny as discussions on love and life so I'm happy with that :-)
Last night she asks me "would you come home with me for 1 million baht?" Laughing I say "are
you crazy Im happy to come home with you for free not even want tip LOL". She says "I know this already but what if I offer you 1 million baht?" A tad perplexed I say "sure of course I'll come". With a cheeky grin she says "hmmm you take money for your body too... maybe you and me same". Hmmm interesting angle LOL. So I ask her if she's seen the movie Indecent Proposal... she starts giggling and says "yes i seen it. And Im like "you not same Demi Moore YaYa and I not have 1 million baht same Richard Gere lol. And in her typical humor she replies "if you have 1 million baht I marry with you tomorrow" hahaha bloody smart-ass.
Nothing really has happened so far... we've had the odd kiss and are flirting with each other... but thats about it so far. Its fun though... she's good company and we always have a good time so I'm happy.
You wanna hear something funny… considering her line of work... and I'm pretty sure you can read between the lines here and understand this girl is making extra money in ways MORE than just massage... but she apparently has only ever kissed 3 guys in her life!! And she says that I'm one of them.... when she stayed in my room last trip to Thailand. Dunno if I 100% believe that yet but she’s got no reason to lie about it. Who knows…
Received: Sat 1 November 2008, 11:30pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Ive had some wine and are a little incoherent tonight. I was going to say something about cross cultural conversations but I think I may have another wine with ***** instead lol lol lol. Sounds like you guys are having a fun time.
Dont forget to wrap it up
Sent: Mon 10 November 2008, 7:16pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey sorry I havent written in so long...
I need some girly advice from a wise old soul... and you’re it!
Have been seeing YaYa heaps more almost every night at her work for a massage... which normally involves us just sitting around chatting. I've told her I have no money and strangely enough for a Thai girl... she still wants to see me. Ive also told her Im not interested in anything serious if she had someone else on the side. But the problem is she will ALWAYS have someone else on the side... its how she makes money and survives.
Coupla nights ago we're chatting away and I ask what she says if a customer offered her money for sex. She kinda half looked down with this embarrassing smile and said "I ALMOST always say no". I say "what do you mean ALMOST always". She replies "many farang customers ask me this but only 1 time have I gone". I ask what was so special with this 1 customer. She says "he was gentleman and offer so much money I cannot say no". So I surmise "people can buy your heart?" To which she says "nobody can buy my heart". The conversation went on and she basically said that she switches off her heart whenever she is with a customer in the massage room. Eventually I asked her if her heart was switched off when she was with me… to which she replied "I never meet farang like you before… you different... you so easy I can talk to you about anything" which was super nice to hear. I told her I felt the same way and we made a pact that no matter what happened we’d always be honest with each other. Anyway we had a bit of a laugh and the odd kiss then I left.
Back for a massage the next night (just for something different LOL) and we're having our usual banter... we get talking about relationships n stuff. YaYa says something along the lines of "now you know truth about my work I think you scared of ever getting more involved with me". I say "I dont wanna end up falling for a girl I could never have". She says "why you think you can never have me?" I say "it would make me crazy if my GF did specials for other men". She says "many thai lady who work massage same me have farang BF". So I ask her if she thinks that’s what true love is... she says "nooo true love different true love always lives inside heart" and ponders "if I ever love somebody true how can I do my work?" So then I drop the million dollar question "would you give up happy massage for somebody you loved" and she says "if I give up massage how do I survive… massage all I know how to do". Oooh grrr makes me crazy!! At the end of the day she is still putting her hands on another man. All the other sex tourists here that have Thai GF's seem to have this crazy agreement with their girls that its ok for them to give happy endings as long as there is no sex. Maybe I'm going crazy... but I just cant roll with that. How the fuck do I have a GF and let her do that???
Gawd it’s starting to do my fkn head in. She said I can stay with her anytime I want... clearly free of charge... but as yet I havent. I mean all bullshit aside... she's never lied to me about anything. And honestly… life here aint easy. She doesn't even get a salary at her work... she works for tips only. She could stand in hot sun all day trying to get farangs inside for a massage... but if no customers come in she gets nuthin!! Normally a massage at her work costs 300 baht... of that YaYa gets 100 (about $2 aus!!!) plus gets to keep the tip. Every time Im there... she always slips the 100 baht she earnt back into my pocket as Im walking out. Maybe doesnt sound like a big deal... but that’s everything she earnt. Plus she refuses to take any tips from me... and tells me if I want oil (normally extra) to buy it at 7eleven and sneak it up. Clearly, she doesnt want me for my money... anyway she thinks im nearly broke. So heres where I need some advice... I cant handle the thought of what she does... it would send me nuts. But maybe I could find her a good paying job doing something else... I dunno. YaYa is a good girl with a good heart... that much I dont doubt... she's just stuck in a country where she's gotta sell her soul to survive. And Im starting to like a girl that I'd have to sell my soul to be with her...
Should I walk away now with my heart intact??
OR
Give this a chance and see where it ends up??
CONFUSED SPUTZ
Received: Tue 11 November 2008, 11:52am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Holy fuck Sputters... I've just had to read your message twice...
By the sounds of things YaYa is just doing her job to survive, but I can completely understand where you are coming from, I wouldn't want my partner or the person whom I was in love with doing sexual favours with anyone else but me, even if it were for money.
Look, I think bottom line is, if she is willing to get out of the business and try and find some other source of work, or agrees to find something else, then perhaps you may be able to salvage something of this. Have you actually asked her "DOES SHE ENJOY HER JOB"? I know so many girls in her position think that is their only option, and they don't know any better, so they just continue to do what they are familiar with no matter what the cost is... When they are desperate to earn a few quid, they will do anything... so I think it was a good move on your behalf to lay it straight on the table and tell her you have no money. Because either: A) If she was after you and your money only- she will continue as normal, see other guys and you will be left alone to watch the sunset- basically she won't want anything to do with you and hope you will disappear into the sunset, because you have nothing to offer her.
B) If you have told her there is no money, and she still wants to spend time with you, hang out, get to know you better, and see's her job as a means to an end.... Then I think she sounds intelligent enough to know there are many other money making options.
Look I know jobs don't come easily in Thailand, but perhaps part of your adventure there, is to help lead her away from the path of prostitution (bottom line, that's what it is, she's just not standing on the street.) sorry, I don't want that to come across harsh but by definition prostitution is someone that in exchange for money will perform a sexual act....
Remember the movie Pretty Women with Julia Roberts & Richard Geere. The story line of a prostitute who is hired by Richard Geere's character, only he doesn’t sleep with her, he just hires her to attend functions and for his company & because she is absolutely drop dead gorgeous... it was all about the look... anyhow blah blah blah... the storyline goes on and she realises that for the 10 past years of her life she is doing this job, because that is all she knows, she hasn't been educated or had any other skill that she feels she can offer... BUT... through meeting Richard Geere, she starts to realize that the world is a much bigger place and she is a part of it... That her options were endless... It only took Richard Geere to make her realise this... she wanted to move on and start living life and experiencing love...
Maybe your YaYa's Richard Geere....
Oh god this is such a tricky one... but from a females perspective... If she does really have feelings for you, and wants to be with you, she will give up her business and try and find something else and if she doesn't, you really have to ask yourself, are you going to sleep well at night by knowing your gal is sharing intimacy with someone other than you...
Because my friend as far as I know... you are a one-on-one man....
I don't want to judge the girl… but in the end only you will know what is right. Remember that great 7th sense we all have, however not all of us use... intuition... well you’ve got it and you use it well.
So my friend... I'm not sure if I've helped you at all with this one, and if you want to respond to me by calling me a bitch for using the word prostitution...go ahead...I wont be offended... I just hope I haven't offended you. The only message that keeps popping up in my head whilst I've been writing this whole email is: "You will know the answer"
Stay strong & DO NOT weaken EVEN if you think you are having a pussy whipped moment...
and you have reason not to be...
Ciao for now Bello
Jxxx
Received: Thu 13 November 2008, 8:30pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
GUESS WHAT... Ive found vegemite... in Phuket!!!!
And haven’t I been having some fun with it... been playing pranks on all my Thai friends hehe. I spread some on Kung's rice last night... told her it was a special Aussie butter that we use on everything... LOL LOL LOL... you should have seen the look on her face when she saw this black shit all over her rice hahahaha. When she gingerly took a mouthful... OMG I swear to god I almost pooped my pants laughing... haha... she looked like she was about to give birth LOL LOL... payback for all the fire breathing chilli they make me eat hehehe LOVE IT :-P
Re your last email… WOW… there’s good reason why I confide in you. Absolutely loved the Pretty Women analogy LOL… that’s basically the situation I'm in... well less Richard Gere's charisma anyway. Seriously thanks heaps that... I was starting to come up with crazy ideas in my head that would justify me being with her in her current situation.
Yup, Ive asked her if she enjoys her job... she says she likes the massaging but not the extras. I also asked her why she just doesn't become a bar girl... she'd make a fortune. She says because the bar girls have to go home with any man that pays their bar fine... they have no choice. She says by being 'only' a masseuse, she has the freedom to choose if she takes a client home or not. She says freedom is the last thing she has left... and she'll never give that up no matter what the cost... which I do rate. Look I know she’s basically a pr.. pros.. prosti.. nup I just cant say it hehehe. But at least she hasn't completely sold out on herself and just gone and worked in a bar.
You dont have to apologise for calling it as you see it... it’s why I came to you for advice. I hated reading it... but I do appreciate the cander... I probably needed to hear it anyway.
Last night YaYa asked me if Ive been with any other Thai girls… I say to her "yeah have been with 1" and she says "aaay why you not tell me… was it bar girl??" Im like "nooo are you crazy it was massage girl LOL" her eyes almost popping out of her head she exclaims "WHAAAT!!" Ultra casually I say "yeah was about 6 months ago" now grinning she says "what her name?" to which I happily respond "her name YaYa" hehe hehe :-p
We've been spending most of our time together at her work... sometimes we wander up the street to grab a bite to eat... but even then its only for an hour or so. Ive been thinking I might ask her out somewhere soon. Even if its just to get her out of work for a few hours so we can spend some quality time together....
Anyhoo after reading your email... maybe this will somehow work itself out and have a happy ending... pardon the pun LOL. Im just going with the flow at the moment.
Might cost me my heart in the end...
But won’t be the first time its been broken.
Love ya darlin
Richard xx
Date: Fri 14 November 2008, 10:42am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
I just got the giggles reading your last email...you signing it Richard hehehe. Then you had me in tears with the vegemite pranks lol lol lol… I can so picture you doing that too!!
But seriously as soon as I read your story... Pretty Women was the first thing that popped into my head. Probably a little bit of a rant on my behalf as it was a message written from work.
Keep me updated on your "Pretty Women" scenario... in fact from now on YaYa is going to be called "Viv" Vivienne was Julia Roberts character... lol lol... oh that's me laughing to myself... I guess you will now be known as Dick... get it..."Richard" Geere??? lol lol lol lol... yes not much changes, I still crack myself up.
Jxxx
Received: Sat 15 November 2008, 10:37pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Well I managed to drag YaYa away from work last night... I just walked straight in and told her BO
SS (we get along like a house on fire) that YaYa had a hot date with a very good looking man... LOL... and that she'd be gone for a few hours. BOSS just laughed and said "ok Joy only because you my number 1 customer LOL". All the other girls started whistling as we walked out hehehe was funny as :-) We had a really cruisy night too... just wandered around Bangla Road laughing at everybody... had some dinner and basically chatted all night. Was kinda nice too... walking around with her hand in hand... its the first time we've done that sort of stuff since Ive been back. So I guess Im pretty happy at the moment... Im way past the point of being a customer... even all the other massage girls at YaYa's work see me as a friend now. Which is cool because they trust me with all their little secrets LOL. Mate some of the conversations YaYa and Ive had about the funny stuff that happens during special massages have been hilarious... LOL
Stay safe yeah...
Love Dick
Ohhh that just sounds all wrong.
Date: Sun 16 November 2008, 10:09am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey I tried to call you last night... where were you?? No doubt you're ignoring me now that you're having too much... hmm never mind. Typical man ;-)
Wow by the sounds of things... maybe you and YaYa will be married soon and have beautiful blue eyed tanned skinned babies... and I can finally book my trip to Thailand for the wedding... and ahhh never mind Im just trying to amuse myself again lol lol
The weather here at the moment is shit....we went from nice warm days... you know the ones that lead you into the false sense of security that summer is here and then BAM... the last 4 days haven't gotten over 16 degrees...
Wishing I was there............
Jxxx
Date: Sunday 23 November 2008, 7:01pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
How the hell are ya sunshine???
Okies... heres the latest on the great YaYa love story... The other night I was out with a few friends and guess who walks past holding hands with another man (ie customer) yeah you guessed it... YaYa. As she walked past we exchanged glances... she was shocked to see me and I could tell by the look in her eyes that she didn't think she'd ever see me again... and after seeing her holding hands with a customer (or whoever he was) I had every intention of NEVER going back.
I mean I knew that was what she did... but when I actually saw her with someone else (esp the holding hands part) it just pissed me off. Plus she always said to me she's only ever taken 1 customer home. Now co-incidentally this is number 2... and while Im here!!! What I'm supposed to just believe that??!! Oooh GRRRR... fkn Thai girls!!
Anyway on Friday... it was YaYa's day off... so I went to her work to hear all the gossip from her friends..All they are al
l telling me how much YaYa is missing me... and that we need to sit down and talk blah blah. Yeah whatever!! So I'm downstairs with halfway through a foot massage with one of he other girls... and guess who walks into the shop on her day off? Yeah YaYa!! One of the girls must have called her and told her I was there. Straight away the girl who is giving me the foot massage says "oh sorry I have to go have another customer" and walks away... just in time for YaYa to sit down and takes over the massage. Talk about a set up LOL. So I ask her why she comes to work on her day off... and she just does her cute little giggle and says "I dont know just walk past my work very innocent and see you here, ooh I can never believe how lucky I am today." LOL bullshit haha!!!! So we start chatting about the other night... I told her it drove me crazy to see her with another man. She says "its my job if I have customer sometimes I need to make them feel happy but customer never in my heart". I say "well you looked pretty comfortable with him". She says "I've learnt to fake happiness on the outside" so I ask the obvious question "how do I know you’re not faking it with me?" She says "you different I tell you this many times" and then adds "you would never believe what I think of you in my heart".
Look... I dunno... maybe she does genuinely like me... and she is only acting with customers to keep them happy... maybe I need to re-read your Pretty Woman analogy again. I can probably semi handle her doing the odd happy ending massage WITHIN THE CONFINES of her work FOR THE TIME BEING... only because we're not BF/GF.
The part I was struggling with was why was she HOLDING HANDS OUTSIDE of work with a customer (that she's always maintained mean nothing to her emotionally) and ALSO now how can I believe she has only taken home 1 customer??!! I try to explain express all this to her... in simple english... eventually she says "I never lie to you... only 1 customer have I taken home and ever been outside work with". Then BANG... the truth hit me!! I say "the man i see you holding hands with was Mr "A Little Bit More Than A Customer". that she was in Ko Samui with when I first got back to Phuket..She simply nods and puts her head down.
Fuck.
You reckon I didn't feel sick to the stomach. So this guy 'a little bit more than a customer' is STILL HERE in Thailand!! It’s a hard feeling for me to explain to you. On one hand it’s what she does... I knew that from the get-go but on the other hand I guess I kinda secretly hoped she’d just magically stop. Maybe this was my reality check. I just dont know...
Apparently she's only ever loved one man before... a long time before she even came to Phuket when she was a young girl. He was a Thai man... her childhood sweetheart and the father of her daughter (yah she has a daughter). Anyway she fell pregnant to him at 16 years old the third she ever had sex. She says "my village very poor nobody tell me about condonGs" (condonGs... hehe). Anyway the story goes she gave him all her heart but apparently he broke it time and time again... and now she wont let herself love a man like that again... I quote "true love too much pain because if finish leave heart empty". Hmmm she has mentioned this a few times... that she wont let herself fall in love with a man...
Guess its time to lay it on the line to her... dont even know what Im gonna say. But Ive got this fantastic hammock that sleeps 2 and know a really nice quiet spot on the beach here. Maybe after she gets off work one night... I'll surprise her and take her down to the beach... always a good spot for a chat...
good spot for many things actually ;)
Stay safe yeah...
ME
Date: Monday 24 November, 2008, 11:43am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey Stranger :-)
I think you've got you're head in the right spot here. You can take solace that at least she wasn't outside of work with any old customer off the street. This relationship... or whatever it is right now... clearly can't survive forever like this.
So I think it’s definitely a good idea to lay it on the line. No girl likes an ultimatum, but at the end of the day, I think that’s what you need to give her here.
Not much to tell over here... the weather is still grey and gloomy. So for right now, I don't want to hear about hammocks on the beach, hot muggy days, beers at bars or anything that is going to remind me I'm stuck in this shit hole of a place.
Keep me posted on this ok...
Jxxx
Date: Mon 1 December 2008, 9:22pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
I think you need a break from the day to day grind... may I suggest Phuket ;-) I know by the time Ive finished this sentence... you've probably already come up with 10 perfectly rational reasons as too why you shouldn’t come over. That’s ok... I guess hammocks, 30deg days and dark skin just aren't for everybody ;-) Speaking of hammocks and dark skin.... heres the lowdown on YaYa...
MR ' little bit more than a customer' has gone back to Europe now... so its just been the two of us lately... and we've been spending heaps more time together. A few nights ago I picked YaYa up after work... didn’t tell her I was coming so it was a total surprise. Took her down to the beach with my trusty hammock and a bottle of wine that I'd hidden in my daypack... set up camp right on the sand... even had the local ice creamery hand deliver us 2 of their super banana and coconut splits right to our hammock hehe fkn gold... she loved it!!! We had such a good time too... it was a perfect night... no clouds, we just laid around chatting and having fun. After we polished the wine off, she started opening up at bit more... and yes I did manage to tell her I just cant keep going on like this... seeing her when she is doing happy massages. She totally understood... so we just left it at that and enjoyed the rest of the night. Although I did manage to roll us both off the hammock and onto the sand once LOL funny as.
So that was it... you know I just left the ball in her court, so to speak. I dunno what else I could have done... I mean hammock, moon-lite night and ice creams... mate gotta give myself kudos for that hehe.
God this has the makings of a fkn book.
Stay safe yeah xx
PS… HAPPY BIRTHDAY for tomorrow…
thought Id forgotten didnt ya :-D
Date: Wed 3 December 2008, 4:47pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hahaha yes I'd already hung you... thought you would forget for sure. Thanks for the happy b'day voice message you left…
And then my perfect timing calling you back in the middle of a Yaya yippy I aye massage session lol lol. I still can’t believe I actually got to talk to her… and that we share the same birthday hahaha. Did you buy her a gift?? Oh my... This is really turning into quiet a story...
Maybe you can sell it to a romance author you never know it could be a best seller. Of course they'd have to change the names to protect the innocent... or in your case the guilty lol lol. Maybe you could be Sputnik the Great and YaYa could be Yippy Yippy YoYo... lol lol yes Im bored again...
Oh by the way... I seen **** at the Town Centre the other day. Did he tell you?? It was so funny... we were talking about your little adventures and he was complaining that his wife is threatening him with no more sex until he starts being more romantic hahaha... he reckons its all your fault with your stories of hammocks and ice cream sundaes LOL. He said if you don't shut-up he's gonna have to disconnect his home computer so he can finally get some loving from his wife again lol lol hahahaha! I couldn't stop laughing at him.
Gimme another update soon easy traveller...
Date: Mon 8 December 2008, 4:15pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hahaha that explains the text I got from him the other day hehehehe that's funny!!
Yeah I did get her a gift... a bottle of perfume. She loved it. She says "oooh you know how to shop for lady eh" LOL LOL
Last night YaYa and I were having dinner at this nice little outdoor restuarant on the beach
... they had this Thai girl singing... had a fkn amazing voice too. Anyway she sang that 'Bleeding Veins' (or whateva its called) by Leona Lewis. After it finished YaYa says to me "I want you listen to words in that song please listen close because it how you make me feel". I havent had a chance to google the lyrics yet... but got a basic jist of the song last night.
Gawd **** Im really starting to like her... this wasn't supposed to happen. All I know is Im getting that giddy feeling in my stomach whenever she's around.
Then this morning I get a message on my Thai phone saying YaYa has just bought a 1 way Air Asia ticket back to her home village on the 22nd December... and that she wants to see me before I fly back home!!! Dunno whats going on until i see her again... maybe she is quitting massage… maybe she wants me to come back with her... guess I'll find out soon enough....
Date: Tue 9 December 2008, 2:42pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
So the plot thickens... AGAIN... lol lol
Its "actually called 'Bleeding Love' SPUTNIK... just googled the lyrics myself. WOW. You seriously need to read them... they tie in perfectly with everything she's always maintained about not wanting to let herself love again etc etc. That’s pretty powerful dude... esp coming from someone in her situation.
By the sounds of things you're coming home soon... will you bring her back... is that your plan?? Will we finally get to meet her... or have you been doing too much partying over there and run out of money??? Gawd... you've been gone what... almost 3 months now... feels more like 6.
Let me know if I need to start practising my sawadee kaaaa ;-)
Date: Sun 15 December 2008, 7:47pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
This will be my last email. Im in the transit lounge at BKK airport.
YaYa wanted me to come back to her village with her on the 22nd and spend Christmas with her family… which I’d love to but honestly Im almost out of money… I’ve got no choice... have to come home.
Yesterday I sent ******from Flight Centre an email asking if she needs any good travel consultants… she said she’d fit me in somewhere. Hopefully only for a few months so I can re-save and come back over here for good.
As for me and YaYa… FUCK FUCK FUCK is all I can say. I can’t bring her back... its still too complicated. But she's given me her number and I promised her Id call when I get back to Australia.
We said our goodbyes at her work… in the massage room. We hardly spoke a word the whole time. At the end Im fumbling around like a fucktard trying find the right words… trying to say how much I’ll miss her… and she just threw her arms around me and wouldn’t let me go. She said something… don’t ask me what it was… I honestly couldn’t tell you.
All I remember is feeling her tears on my neck…
and thinking fuck I just don’t wanna let you go…
ME
When I got back to Sydney I somehow managed to lose YaYa's number. It was written on a bit of paper that YaYa had given me and Id put in the back pocket of my jeans. They inadvertantly went through the wash when I got home and rendered the number unreadable. But I still had her works business card so I sent her BOSS an SMS asking if she could ask YaYa to re-send her number. This is the reply I got:"Hi Joy how is Sydney? So sorry YaYa not work here now. she go home already i dont know if she will come back. how are you we all miss you. very hot here. love BOSS"
So that was it... there was no just way I could contact her... she didnt have my Australian number... and I didn't know where her home village was. I thought we'd lost each other forever. There was no way to find her or see her again.
I like to call it the way things are supposed to be...
Anyone who knows me... knows YaYa to one degree or another. But only my 2 absolute closests friends know the full story. Ive decided to BLOG it for may reasons... because it’s such a big part of why my life is where it is now... because I think its a story worth telling... and because somebody said to me the other day they're giving up on love.
Its uncut and unedited... apart from the photos Ive added and names + emails have been withheld to protect the guilty ;-)
Date: Wed 23 July 2008, 3:02pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: Welcome to Phuket
Hey ya'll...
Landed in Phuket last night from Chiang Mai... business class on Thai Airways WOOT!!! Makes a nice change from stewardesses screaming in my ear LOL.
This place is completely insane… my heads still spinning. Started off normal enough with a mini bus transfer from Phuket airport with 3 ladyboys, 2 gay Arabs and a surfer from Hawaii. Got to my hotel at 11pm and the city was crawling with freaks!! And the occasional person... so decided I'd check out the nightlife.
OMG there was everything from drunk Aussie guys walking around in nappies (WTF?) to Thai girls hugging 80 year old men. Plus it appears to be normal here to squeeze as many people onto a motorbike as possible... I saw one with 5!!!! They were sitting on each others shoulders hahaha. Oh and of course the highlight of the night had to have been getting grabbed on the nuts by an attractive Thai girl only to have *her* say in a deep voice... you want some lovin darlin! Faaark what is going on here!!!
So I went to bed confused lol... then this morning go outside again and get swarmed by street sellers trying to sell me a suit... then the Tuk-Tuk drivers constantly asking me if I need any drugs!! Freakin hell... must have said "no thanks mate" 20 times within the first 10 minutes of stepping out my hotel. Then... just after I thought everything was normal... I get bombed with cries of "hellooow massaaaaage" from across the street from all these beautiful Thai massage girls LOL!! Hmmm I must admit the massage girls got more attention than the Tuk-Tuk drivers hehehe. But there was this one particular massage girl who was dead set beautiful... she had long wavy hair and a smile that lit up from across the road. I might just 'accidently' be on her side of the street when I walk back to my hotel tonight LOL
Just booked some tours... going snorkelling 2moz... then Phi Phi Island in a few days. Tonight I was thinking about going to see the Muay Thai Kickboxing. Anyhow... I'm in this internet cafe trying to escape the chaos... gonna go get myself into trouble now hehe.
Chat soon...
Date: Thu 24 July 2008, 10:04pm
To: me@hotmail.com
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Mate watch those ladyboys LOL. Are they an easy pick??? If anyone was gonna accidently take home a girl with hairy nuts it would be U... LOL it would be the greatest Rodd Story of all time LMAO
Im pissing myself laughing even thinking about it....
Date: Fri 25 July 2008, 11:55am
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Mate their 6 foot height and fake boobs is a give away. But some are petite and slim, plus look really natural. I'm buggered if I know LOL...
Hey I met that massage girl I was talking about in my last email.. walking back from the beach. I totally forgot about her to be honest until I hear the 'hellooow massage' cries again LOL. And out of the 20 odd massage girls at her shop... guess who steps out with her arms spread out to stop me from walking past... yeah HER. Im thinking cool that’s gotta be a sign LOL so go for a massage.
We go inside, she says "ok get undressed and I back 2 minutes I go get changed". So WTF does that mean haha??! So I take everything off... but kept my Calvin Klein undies on right... cus honestly I have no idea if this is a normal massage like we get in Australia or some seedy sex massage. Anyway, so she returns now devoid of the traditional Thai dress she was wearing on the street... now she is wearing hot pink beach shorts. We're getting acquainted with some light chat... about family and blah blah. Then she takes my towel off... and sees that I'm still wearing my Calvin Klein undies lol... she playfully says "ooooh you shy man you not take everything off" LOL friggin hell!! I stutter out "just massage... back shoulders and legs thanks". Then she starts joking about me being gay... since I didn't take everything off LOL. Was quiet a funny experience. Actually ended up being one of the best massages I've ever had... not to hard but not too soft... probably a good description for a few things ;-)
And NO... no happy ending. But YES... that option was clearly made available to me. Shit I cant even remember her name... think she said it was Oy... or maybe Oy Ya... LOL who knows maybe I'll just call her Miss Massage hehe
Date: Sat 26 July 2008, 9:21pm
To: me@hotmail.com
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Hey tried calling U yesterday... U didn't answer... probably still lovin all the attention from these exotic sounding Thai chicks... lucky bastard. When U comin back eh...
Faaaark me... sounds like my kind of massage LMAO. Might have to have a chat to *** tonight about moving me entire family over there LOL... no wait Id end up divorced in 3 days LMAO.
Date: Sun 27 July 2008, 11:04am
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Last night I returned for another massage... its only like 200 baht ($8!) mate as if Im not gonna have one every day haha!! Her name is not Oy Ya... its YaYa.
She's keeps trying to get me for a happy handing... honestly mate I dont think too many guys say no to her. She's real flirty and playful... but she aint getting me... not like THAT anyway.
When we walked back downstairs all the other masseuses’ were looking at me giggling... LOL friggin hell nothing even happened... and YaYa was just kinda looking over at them with raised eyebrows and a surprised smirk as if to say nope I still didn't get him LMAO.
I gotta say... she has these amazing eyes... well she has amazing everything LOL... but her eyes... heeeey ya... you'd love em... the deep and soulful type.
Gawd I'm in love hehehehehe
Date: Mon 28 July 2008, 7:34pm
To: me@hotmail.com
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
You've got a thing for this girl don't U... as soon as U start crappin on eyes and stuff... thats when I know... so confess up already biatch!!! I want details!!!
Or have U been abducted by ladyboys again LMAO???
Date: Tue 29 July 2008, 7:02pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: Welcome to Phuket
Hey bud...
Yeah I do like her a bit... there is just something about this girl. But at the end of the day... I live in Sydney and she live here in Phuket... so love can never happen buddy. Anyway can you honestly imagine me ever having a Thai GF... hahaha yeah right!!!!
You're seriously not gonna believe what happened to me last night... I got invited by YaYa to a PRIVATE party at the massage place... it was one of the other girls birthdays at the shop. And there were 16... yep count them 16 beautiful Thai massage girls plus me haha! Gold! It was an awesome night too... chilling out with YaYa and her friends. So the night is starting to wind down... the mood is good so I take a gamble and ask YaYa if she wants to stay me for the night. At first she said she can't cus she needs to go home with her friends. So ok, fair enough.... ego slightly dented I say "thanks for a nice night" and start walking off. Didn't even reach the footpath before I hear "W-A-I-T" ... and turn around to see YaYa standing there with a smile... "how big is your bed" she jokes LOL hahaha!! So I'm like "its big enough for 2, you can kick your legs around as much as you want". She laughs and says "ok I need to tell my friend where I go so they not worry". Cool so she is giggling and talking to her friends in Thai... they're all looking at me... and gigglin some more LOL. Mate it was like an episode of Seinfeld hahaha. As we're leaving her friend whispers in my ear "look after her she a good girl ok". So YaYa takes my hand and we start walking home. And thats all I'm giving you CAVEMAN...
You'll have to use your imagination to fill in the blanks;-) WOOOT!!!
I'm gonna go back up to see her a little later... see how she's holding up after last night. If shes still talking to me that is... I had to kick us both out of bed at 8am because of that Phi Phi Island tour Id already booked... felt a bit bad couldn't even buy her breakfast hehe. Mate she's an awesome chick... you'd really like her yeah.
This place has really grown on me eh... I had a real interesting conversation with a Thai man today about working here... will tell you about it when I get back. Flying out tomorrow.
Stay safe mate
On the plane coming home... for some reason I couldn't stop thinking about this exotic Thai massage girl I had met. I didn't have her phone number... so when I got back to Sydney I got a photo developed of myself and YaYa together in Phuket... and made it in a nice timber frame... then paid my local Thai restaurant $20 to translate a note I'd written her into Thai for me. I put the note and the photo in a box and sent it off to YaYa's work. I didn't even know if she would ever receive it.
Then 3 months later... I got my hands on a 1 year Thai working VISA, quit my job at Flight Centre and headed back over to SE Asia... and Thailand again...
Received: Tue 21 October 2008, 10:21am
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: YaYa
Ok that SMS went to 4 people only: ***, ***, ***** and YOU!!! So stop crying love… bloody female drama queens ;-)
Hey I walked up to YaYa’s work last night... she wasn’t there. All the other girls remembered me though... it seems the photo and little note I sent was a big hit... they couldnt stop saying how sweet it was LOL!! HaHa I cant believe she actually got it!!! Although thought I overheard one of them saying YaYa was in Ko Samui with a boyfriend... hopefully I misheard.
Ive been a bit crook last coupla days... must have been those fried mosquitoes I ate (Im not joking). You’re prob killing yourself laughing thinking its the Vanuatu peanut situation all over again hehehe.
Anyhoo... gotta do a big groupie email now.
Sputz
Date: Wed 22 October 2008, 2:37pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Are you sure it's not Malaria again… peanuts can give you a bad case of that… but if you’ve been eating mosquitoes (WTF??) then you’d have it for sure lol.
If Miss YaYa does have a boyfriend, it's not like you've started this amazing relationship (yet) and at least no hearts will be broken... perhaps just a dented ego.
By the way what is it with you using my name ****?? Shit… reminds me of when I was in trouble as a kid... my mum would say **** with tone. Grrrrr
Hurry up and get married so I can book my trip to Thailand...
Jxxx
Received: Thu 23 October 2008, 6:55pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Im ok now… must have only been a mild case of Malaria. Maybe she does have a boyfriend now... I really dunno. Can’t seem to get a straight answer out of anyone re her whereabouts. But just quietly it will be a bit more than a dented ego if it turns out she does. What is it about this girl... FRIG why am I so nervous to see her again???
I think she may be back here now. If she’s not then the weddings off GOD DAMMIT ;-)
You know what… Im gonna have a shower and wander up there now.
ME
Date: Fri 24 October 2008, 9:32am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey have you seen your Thai princess yet?? Does she have the BF in tow or not??
Just got some of your photo's... how did you get such good photos of the KL tower at night... the lights kept reflecting off mine.
So when do you start working you beach bum... and what is this about Vietnam... I'll kill you if you get there before me...
Jxxx
PS: My Mum was "tickled pink" to get a postcard from you:
“Lots of love to you"… quoted from herself.
Date: Tue 28 October 2008, 7:02pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Goodays me lovely.
Guess what… FINALLY saw YaYa last night. I was walking up towards her work and from a
distance could see this tallish girl with long wavy hair standing out the front... I knew it was her straight away. And she's every bit as stunning as I remember her to be hehe ;-)She was COMPLETELY shocked to see me too… you should've seen the look on her face... she loved the photo and note... even showed it too me... she kept it all this time in her locker at work!! Anyhoo... heres her scoop... its kinda complicated. Apparently this rich dude from Europe appeared on the scene after I left in July… he took her to Ko Samui last week (hence why she was never at work) but YaYa says he's not a BF. In her words:
"a little bit more than a customer"
LOL ... LOL ... LOL ... LOL
haven't heard that one before.
as clear as mud right :-s
Basically dunno what the fucks going on LOL…
Mr Me
Date: Wed 29 October 2008, 9:05am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
haha hahahaha. Only a Thai girl could say that.
You're having way too much fun, why don't you get a real life that involves going to work each day and doing the same boring monotonous office crap. You might enjoy it... not. I think after what you put up with at Flight Centre... you earnt you this little working vacation
Just got your other groupie email... I had to laugh at the part where you got fined for not having a helmut but they let you continue riding home drunk????
Since when have you been able to ride a Moped anyway Mr Smith??
Jxxx
Sent: Fri 31 October 2008, 8:33pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey Hey :-) I bloody CANT ride a moped... hence why I was only doing 20km/h... its only a short trip from the Open Bar to where all our rooms are. And i was the LEAST drunk out of me Gai and Kung so i rode us all back hehe
Having quiet a cruisy time with Miss YaYa... I must say. Still have no idea what the hell is going on LOL. She hasn't given up on trying to get me to pay for a happy ending LOL… I think she knows I'm not that type of guy. But she keeps trying to make me weak with these seductive massages. I haven't given in yet but it’s become a running joke between us now. We've been having some funny as discussions on love and life so I'm happy with that :-)
Last night she asks me "would you come home with me for 1 million baht?" Laughing I say "are
you crazy Im happy to come home with you for free not even want tip LOL". She says "I know this already but what if I offer you 1 million baht?" A tad perplexed I say "sure of course I'll come". With a cheeky grin she says "hmmm you take money for your body too... maybe you and me same". Hmmm interesting angle LOL. So I ask her if she's seen the movie Indecent Proposal... she starts giggling and says "yes i seen it. And Im like "you not same Demi Moore YaYa and I not have 1 million baht same Richard Gere lol. And in her typical humor she replies "if you have 1 million baht I marry with you tomorrow" hahaha bloody smart-ass.Nothing really has happened so far... we've had the odd kiss and are flirting with each other... but thats about it so far. Its fun though... she's good company and we always have a good time so I'm happy.
You wanna hear something funny… considering her line of work... and I'm pretty sure you can read between the lines here and understand this girl is making extra money in ways MORE than just massage... but she apparently has only ever kissed 3 guys in her life!! And she says that I'm one of them.... when she stayed in my room last trip to Thailand. Dunno if I 100% believe that yet but she’s got no reason to lie about it. Who knows…
Received: Sat 1 November 2008, 11:30pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Ive had some wine and are a little incoherent tonight. I was going to say something about cross cultural conversations but I think I may have another wine with ***** instead lol lol lol. Sounds like you guys are having a fun time.
Dont forget to wrap it up
Sent: Mon 10 November 2008, 7:16pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey sorry I havent written in so long...
I need some girly advice from a wise old soul... and you’re it!
Have been seeing YaYa heaps more almost every night at her work for a massage... which normally involves us just sitting around chatting. I've told her I have no money and strangely enough for a Thai girl... she still wants to see me. Ive also told her Im not interested in anything serious if she had someone else on the side. But the problem is she will ALWAYS have someone else on the side... its how she makes money and survives.
Coupla nights ago we're chatting away and I ask what she says if a customer offered her money for sex. She kinda half looked down with this embarrassing smile and said "I ALMOST always say no". I say "what do you mean ALMOST always". She replies "many farang customers ask me this but only 1 time have I gone". I ask what was so special with this 1 customer. She says "he was gentleman and offer so much money I cannot say no". So I surmise "people can buy your heart?" To which she says "nobody can buy my heart". The conversation went on and she basically said that she switches off her heart whenever she is with a customer in the massage room. Eventually I asked her if her heart was switched off when she was with me… to which she replied "I never meet farang like you before… you different... you so easy I can talk to you about anything" which was super nice to hear. I told her I felt the same way and we made a pact that no matter what happened we’d always be honest with each other. Anyway we had a bit of a laugh and the odd kiss then I left.
Back for a massage the next night (just for something different LOL) and we're having our usual banter... we get talking about relationships n stuff. YaYa says something along the lines of "now you know truth about my work I think you scared of ever getting more involved with me". I say "I dont wanna end up falling for a girl I could never have". She says "why you think you can never have me?" I say "it would make me crazy if my GF did specials for other men". She says "many thai lady who work massage same me have farang BF". So I ask her if she thinks that’s what true love is... she says "nooo true love different true love always lives inside heart" and ponders "if I ever love somebody true how can I do my work?" So then I drop the million dollar question "would you give up happy massage for somebody you loved" and she says "if I give up massage how do I survive… massage all I know how to do". Oooh grrr makes me crazy!! At the end of the day she is still putting her hands on another man. All the other sex tourists here that have Thai GF's seem to have this crazy agreement with their girls that its ok for them to give happy endings as long as there is no sex. Maybe I'm going crazy... but I just cant roll with that. How the fuck do I have a GF and let her do that???
Gawd it’s starting to do my fkn head in. She said I can stay with her anytime I want... clearly free of charge... but as yet I havent. I mean all bullshit aside... she's never lied to me about anything. And honestly… life here aint easy. She doesn't even get a salary at her work... she works for tips only. She could stand in hot sun all day trying to get farangs inside for a massage... but if no customers come in she gets nuthin!! Normally a massage at her work costs 300 baht... of that YaYa gets 100 (about $2 aus!!!) plus gets to keep the tip. Every time Im there... she always slips the 100 baht she earnt back into my pocket as Im walking out. Maybe doesnt sound like a big deal... but that’s everything she earnt. Plus she refuses to take any tips from me... and tells me if I want oil (normally extra) to buy it at 7eleven and sneak it up. Clearly, she doesnt want me for my money... anyway she thinks im nearly broke. So heres where I need some advice... I cant handle the thought of what she does... it would send me nuts. But maybe I could find her a good paying job doing something else... I dunno. YaYa is a good girl with a good heart... that much I dont doubt... she's just stuck in a country where she's gotta sell her soul to survive. And Im starting to like a girl that I'd have to sell my soul to be with her...
Should I walk away now with my heart intact??
OR
Give this a chance and see where it ends up??
CONFUSED SPUTZ
Received: Tue 11 November 2008, 11:52am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Holy fuck Sputters... I've just had to read your message twice...
By the sounds of things YaYa is just doing her job to survive, but I can completely understand where you are coming from, I wouldn't want my partner or the person whom I was in love with doing sexual favours with anyone else but me, even if it were for money.
Look, I think bottom line is, if she is willing to get out of the business and try and find some other source of work, or agrees to find something else, then perhaps you may be able to salvage something of this. Have you actually asked her "DOES SHE ENJOY HER JOB"? I know so many girls in her position think that is their only option, and they don't know any better, so they just continue to do what they are familiar with no matter what the cost is... When they are desperate to earn a few quid, they will do anything... so I think it was a good move on your behalf to lay it straight on the table and tell her you have no money. Because either: A) If she was after you and your money only- she will continue as normal, see other guys and you will be left alone to watch the sunset- basically she won't want anything to do with you and hope you will disappear into the sunset, because you have nothing to offer her.
B) If you have told her there is no money, and she still wants to spend time with you, hang out, get to know you better, and see's her job as a means to an end.... Then I think she sounds intelligent enough to know there are many other money making options.
Look I know jobs don't come easily in Thailand, but perhaps part of your adventure there, is to help lead her away from the path of prostitution (bottom line, that's what it is, she's just not standing on the street.) sorry, I don't want that to come across harsh but by definition prostitution is someone that in exchange for money will perform a sexual act....
Remember the movie Pretty Women with Julia Roberts & Richard Geere. The story line of a prostitute who is hired by Richard Geere's character, only he doesn’t sleep with her, he just hires her to attend functions and for his company & because she is absolutely drop dead gorgeous... it was all about the look... anyhow blah blah blah... the storyline goes on and she realises that for the 10 past years of her life she is doing this job, because that is all she knows, she hasn't been educated or had any other skill that she feels she can offer... BUT... through meeting Richard Geere, she starts to realize that the world is a much bigger place and she is a part of it... That her options were endless... It only took Richard Geere to make her realise this... she wanted to move on and start living life and experiencing love...
Maybe your YaYa's Richard Geere....
Oh god this is such a tricky one... but from a females perspective... If she does really have feelings for you, and wants to be with you, she will give up her business and try and find something else and if she doesn't, you really have to ask yourself, are you going to sleep well at night by knowing your gal is sharing intimacy with someone other than you...
Because my friend as far as I know... you are a one-on-one man....
I don't want to judge the girl… but in the end only you will know what is right. Remember that great 7th sense we all have, however not all of us use... intuition... well you’ve got it and you use it well.
So my friend... I'm not sure if I've helped you at all with this one, and if you want to respond to me by calling me a bitch for using the word prostitution...go ahead...I wont be offended... I just hope I haven't offended you. The only message that keeps popping up in my head whilst I've been writing this whole email is: "You will know the answer"
Stay strong & DO NOT weaken EVEN if you think you are having a pussy whipped moment...
and you have reason not to be...
Ciao for now Bello
Jxxx
Received: Thu 13 November 2008, 8:30pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
GUESS WHAT... Ive found vegemite... in Phuket!!!!
And haven’t I been having some fun with it... been playing pranks on all my Thai friends hehe. I spread some on Kung's rice last night... told her it was a special Aussie butter that we use on everything... LOL LOL LOL... you should have seen the look on her face when she saw this black shit all over her rice hahahaha. When she gingerly took a mouthful... OMG I swear to god I almost pooped my pants laughing... haha... she looked like she was about to give birth LOL LOL... payback for all the fire breathing chilli they make me eat hehehe LOVE IT :-P
Re your last email… WOW… there’s good reason why I confide in you. Absolutely loved the Pretty Women analogy LOL… that’s basically the situation I'm in... well less Richard Gere's charisma anyway. Seriously thanks heaps that... I was starting to come up with crazy ideas in my head that would justify me being with her in her current situation.
Yup, Ive asked her if she enjoys her job... she says she likes the massaging but not the extras. I also asked her why she just doesn't become a bar girl... she'd make a fortune. She says because the bar girls have to go home with any man that pays their bar fine... they have no choice. She says by being 'only' a masseuse, she has the freedom to choose if she takes a client home or not. She says freedom is the last thing she has left... and she'll never give that up no matter what the cost... which I do rate. Look I know she’s basically a pr.. pros.. prosti.. nup I just cant say it hehehe. But at least she hasn't completely sold out on herself and just gone and worked in a bar.
You dont have to apologise for calling it as you see it... it’s why I came to you for advice. I hated reading it... but I do appreciate the cander... I probably needed to hear it anyway.
Last night YaYa asked me if Ive been with any other Thai girls… I say to her "yeah have been with 1" and she says "aaay why you not tell me… was it bar girl??" Im like "nooo are you crazy it was massage girl LOL" her eyes almost popping out of her head she exclaims "WHAAAT!!" Ultra casually I say "yeah was about 6 months ago" now grinning she says "what her name?" to which I happily respond "her name YaYa" hehe hehe :-p
We've been spending most of our time together at her work... sometimes we wander up the street to grab a bite to eat... but even then its only for an hour or so. Ive been thinking I might ask her out somewhere soon. Even if its just to get her out of work for a few hours so we can spend some quality time together....
Anyhoo after reading your email... maybe this will somehow work itself out and have a happy ending... pardon the pun LOL. Im just going with the flow at the moment.
Might cost me my heart in the end...
But won’t be the first time its been broken.
Love ya darlin
Richard xx
Date: Fri 14 November 2008, 10:42am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
I just got the giggles reading your last email...you signing it Richard hehehe. Then you had me in tears with the vegemite pranks lol lol lol… I can so picture you doing that too!!
But seriously as soon as I read your story... Pretty Women was the first thing that popped into my head. Probably a little bit of a rant on my behalf as it was a message written from work.
Keep me updated on your "Pretty Women" scenario... in fact from now on YaYa is going to be called "Viv" Vivienne was Julia Roberts character... lol lol... oh that's me laughing to myself... I guess you will now be known as Dick... get it..."Richard" Geere??? lol lol lol lol... yes not much changes, I still crack myself up.
Jxxx
Received: Sat 15 November 2008, 10:37pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Well I managed to drag YaYa away from work last night... I just walked straight in and told her BO
SS (we get along like a house on fire) that YaYa had a hot date with a very good looking man... LOL... and that she'd be gone for a few hours. BOSS just laughed and said "ok Joy only because you my number 1 customer LOL". All the other girls started whistling as we walked out hehehe was funny as :-) We had a really cruisy night too... just wandered around Bangla Road laughing at everybody... had some dinner and basically chatted all night. Was kinda nice too... walking around with her hand in hand... its the first time we've done that sort of stuff since Ive been back. So I guess Im pretty happy at the moment... Im way past the point of being a customer... even all the other massage girls at YaYa's work see me as a friend now. Which is cool because they trust me with all their little secrets LOL. Mate some of the conversations YaYa and Ive had about the funny stuff that happens during special massages have been hilarious... LOLStay safe yeah...
Love Dick
Ohhh that just sounds all wrong.
Date: Sun 16 November 2008, 10:09am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey I tried to call you last night... where were you?? No doubt you're ignoring me now that you're having too much... hmm never mind. Typical man ;-)
Wow by the sounds of things... maybe you and YaYa will be married soon and have beautiful blue eyed tanned skinned babies... and I can finally book my trip to Thailand for the wedding... and ahhh never mind Im just trying to amuse myself again lol lol
The weather here at the moment is shit....we went from nice warm days... you know the ones that lead you into the false sense of security that summer is here and then BAM... the last 4 days haven't gotten over 16 degrees...
Wishing I was there............
Jxxx
Date: Sunday 23 November 2008, 7:01pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
How the hell are ya sunshine???
Okies... heres the latest on the great YaYa love story... The other night I was out with a few friends and guess who walks past holding hands with another man (ie customer) yeah you guessed it... YaYa. As she walked past we exchanged glances... she was shocked to see me and I could tell by the look in her eyes that she didn't think she'd ever see me again... and after seeing her holding hands with a customer (or whoever he was) I had every intention of NEVER going back.
I mean I knew that was what she did... but when I actually saw her with someone else (esp the holding hands part) it just pissed me off. Plus she always said to me she's only ever taken 1 customer home. Now co-incidentally this is number 2... and while Im here!!! What I'm supposed to just believe that??!! Oooh GRRRR... fkn Thai girls!!
Anyway on Friday... it was YaYa's day off... so I went to her work to hear all the gossip from her friends..All they are al
l telling me how much YaYa is missing me... and that we need to sit down and talk blah blah. Yeah whatever!! So I'm downstairs with halfway through a foot massage with one of he other girls... and guess who walks into the shop on her day off? Yeah YaYa!! One of the girls must have called her and told her I was there. Straight away the girl who is giving me the foot massage says "oh sorry I have to go have another customer" and walks away... just in time for YaYa to sit down and takes over the massage. Talk about a set up LOL. So I ask her why she comes to work on her day off... and she just does her cute little giggle and says "I dont know just walk past my work very innocent and see you here, ooh I can never believe how lucky I am today." LOL bullshit haha!!!! So we start chatting about the other night... I told her it drove me crazy to see her with another man. She says "its my job if I have customer sometimes I need to make them feel happy but customer never in my heart". I say "well you looked pretty comfortable with him". She says "I've learnt to fake happiness on the outside" so I ask the obvious question "how do I know you’re not faking it with me?" She says "you different I tell you this many times" and then adds "you would never believe what I think of you in my heart". Look... I dunno... maybe she does genuinely like me... and she is only acting with customers to keep them happy... maybe I need to re-read your Pretty Woman analogy again. I can probably semi handle her doing the odd happy ending massage WITHIN THE CONFINES of her work FOR THE TIME BEING... only because we're not BF/GF.
The part I was struggling with was why was she HOLDING HANDS OUTSIDE of work with a customer (that she's always maintained mean nothing to her emotionally) and ALSO now how can I believe she has only taken home 1 customer??!! I try to explain express all this to her... in simple english... eventually she says "I never lie to you... only 1 customer have I taken home and ever been outside work with". Then BANG... the truth hit me!! I say "the man i see you holding hands with was Mr "A Little Bit More Than A Customer". that she was in Ko Samui with when I first got back to Phuket..She simply nods and puts her head down.
Fuck.
You reckon I didn't feel sick to the stomach. So this guy 'a little bit more than a customer' is STILL HERE in Thailand!! It’s a hard feeling for me to explain to you. On one hand it’s what she does... I knew that from the get-go but on the other hand I guess I kinda secretly hoped she’d just magically stop. Maybe this was my reality check. I just dont know...
Apparently she's only ever loved one man before... a long time before she even came to Phuket when she was a young girl. He was a Thai man... her childhood sweetheart and the father of her daughter (yah she has a daughter). Anyway she fell pregnant to him at 16 years old the third she ever had sex. She says "my village very poor nobody tell me about condonGs" (condonGs... hehe). Anyway the story goes she gave him all her heart but apparently he broke it time and time again... and now she wont let herself love a man like that again... I quote "true love too much pain because if finish leave heart empty". Hmmm she has mentioned this a few times... that she wont let herself fall in love with a man...
Guess its time to lay it on the line to her... dont even know what Im gonna say. But Ive got this fantastic hammock that sleeps 2 and know a really nice quiet spot on the beach here. Maybe after she gets off work one night... I'll surprise her and take her down to the beach... always a good spot for a chat...
good spot for many things actually ;)
Stay safe yeah...
ME
Date: Monday 24 November, 2008, 11:43am
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hey Stranger :-)
I think you've got you're head in the right spot here. You can take solace that at least she wasn't outside of work with any old customer off the street. This relationship... or whatever it is right now... clearly can't survive forever like this.
So I think it’s definitely a good idea to lay it on the line. No girl likes an ultimatum, but at the end of the day, I think that’s what you need to give her here.
Not much to tell over here... the weather is still grey and gloomy. So for right now, I don't want to hear about hammocks on the beach, hot muggy days, beers at bars or anything that is going to remind me I'm stuck in this shit hole of a place.
Keep me posted on this ok...
Jxxx
Date: Mon 1 December 2008, 9:22pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
I think you need a break from the day to day grind... may I suggest Phuket ;-) I know by the time Ive finished this sentence... you've probably already come up with 10 perfectly rational reasons as too why you shouldn’t come over. That’s ok... I guess hammocks, 30deg days and dark skin just aren't for everybody ;-) Speaking of hammocks and dark skin.... heres the lowdown on YaYa...
MR ' little bit more than a customer' has gone back to Europe now... so its just been the two of us lately... and we've been spending heaps more time together. A few nights ago I picked YaYa up after work... didn’t tell her I was coming so it was a total surprise. Took her down to the beach with my trusty hammock and a bottle of wine that I'd hidden in my daypack... set up camp right on the sand... even had the local ice creamery hand deliver us 2 of their super banana and coconut splits right to our hammock hehe fkn gold... she loved it!!! We had such a good time too... it was a perfect night... no clouds, we just laid around chatting and having fun. After we polished the wine off, she started opening up at bit more... and yes I did manage to tell her I just cant keep going on like this... seeing her when she is doing happy massages. She totally understood... so we just left it at that and enjoyed the rest of the night. Although I did manage to roll us both off the hammock and onto the sand once LOL funny as.
So that was it... you know I just left the ball in her court, so to speak. I dunno what else I could have done... I mean hammock, moon-lite night and ice creams... mate gotta give myself kudos for that hehe.
God this has the makings of a fkn book.
Stay safe yeah xx
PS… HAPPY BIRTHDAY for tomorrow…
thought Id forgotten didnt ya :-D
Date: Wed 3 December 2008, 4:47pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hahaha yes I'd already hung you... thought you would forget for sure. Thanks for the happy b'day voice message you left…
And then my perfect timing calling you back in the middle of a Yaya yippy I aye massage session lol lol. I still can’t believe I actually got to talk to her… and that we share the same birthday hahaha. Did you buy her a gift?? Oh my... This is really turning into quiet a story...
Maybe you can sell it to a romance author you never know it could be a best seller. Of course they'd have to change the names to protect the innocent... or in your case the guilty lol lol. Maybe you could be Sputnik the Great and YaYa could be Yippy Yippy YoYo... lol lol yes Im bored again...
Oh by the way... I seen **** at the Town Centre the other day. Did he tell you?? It was so funny... we were talking about your little adventures and he was complaining that his wife is threatening him with no more sex until he starts being more romantic hahaha... he reckons its all your fault with your stories of hammocks and ice cream sundaes LOL. He said if you don't shut-up he's gonna have to disconnect his home computer so he can finally get some loving from his wife again lol lol hahahaha! I couldn't stop laughing at him.
Gimme another update soon easy traveller...
Date: Mon 8 December 2008, 4:15pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
Hahaha that explains the text I got from him the other day hehehehe that's funny!!
Yeah I did get her a gift... a bottle of perfume. She loved it. She says "oooh you know how to shop for lady eh" LOL LOL
Last night YaYa and I were having dinner at this nice little outdoor restuarant on the beach
... they had this Thai girl singing... had a fkn amazing voice too. Anyway she sang that 'Bleeding Veins' (or whateva its called) by Leona Lewis. After it finished YaYa says to me "I want you listen to words in that song please listen close because it how you make me feel". I havent had a chance to google the lyrics yet... but got a basic jist of the song last night.Gawd **** Im really starting to like her... this wasn't supposed to happen. All I know is Im getting that giddy feeling in my stomach whenever she's around.
Then this morning I get a message on my Thai phone saying YaYa has just bought a 1 way Air Asia ticket back to her home village on the 22nd December... and that she wants to see me before I fly back home!!! Dunno whats going on until i see her again... maybe she is quitting massage… maybe she wants me to come back with her... guess I'll find out soon enough....
Date: Tue 9 December 2008, 2:42pm
From: friends@yahoo.com.au
To: me@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: YaYa
So the plot thickens... AGAIN... lol lol
Its "actually called 'Bleeding Love' SPUTNIK... just googled the lyrics myself. WOW. You seriously need to read them... they tie in perfectly with everything she's always maintained about not wanting to let herself love again etc etc. That’s pretty powerful dude... esp coming from someone in her situation.
By the sounds of things you're coming home soon... will you bring her back... is that your plan?? Will we finally get to meet her... or have you been doing too much partying over there and run out of money??? Gawd... you've been gone what... almost 3 months now... feels more like 6.
Let me know if I need to start practising my sawadee kaaaa ;-)
Date: Sun 15 December 2008, 7:47pm
From: me@hotmail.com
To: friends@yahoo.com.au
Subject: RE: YaYa
This will be my last email. Im in the transit lounge at BKK airport.
YaYa wanted me to come back to her village with her on the 22nd and spend Christmas with her family… which I’d love to but honestly Im almost out of money… I’ve got no choice... have to come home.
Yesterday I sent ******from Flight Centre an email asking if she needs any good travel consultants… she said she’d fit me in somewhere. Hopefully only for a few months so I can re-save and come back over here for good.
As for me and YaYa… FUCK FUCK FUCK is all I can say. I can’t bring her back... its still too complicated. But she's given me her number and I promised her Id call when I get back to Australia.
We said our goodbyes at her work… in the massage room. We hardly spoke a word the whole time. At the end Im fumbling around like a fucktard trying find the right words… trying to say how much I’ll miss her… and she just threw her arms around me and wouldn’t let me go. She said something… don’t ask me what it was… I honestly couldn’t tell you.
All I remember is feeling her tears on my neck…
and thinking fuck I just don’t wanna let you go…
ME
When I got back to Sydney I somehow managed to lose YaYa's number. It was written on a bit of paper that YaYa had given me and Id put in the back pocket of my jeans. They inadvertantly went through the wash when I got home and rendered the number unreadable. But I still had her works business card so I sent her BOSS an SMS asking if she could ask YaYa to re-send her number. This is the reply I got:"Hi Joy how is Sydney? So sorry YaYa not work here now. she go home already i dont know if she will come back. how are you we all miss you. very hot here. love BOSS"
So that was it... there was no just way I could contact her... she didnt have my Australian number... and I didn't know where her home village was. I thought we'd lost each other forever. There was no way to find her or see her again.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
