A part of me...

You know, ive been thinking about Tex tonight... I cant believe it, he has already been gone for 8 months... but Im still thinking about him every day. For sure some people who read this will think "this guy is effin crazy he is talking about a dog"... and thats ok. I dont expect everybody to understand. But Tex was the only thing that didnt leave me in the last 15 years. He was with me through marriages, divorces, deaths, the happiest and saddest times in my life... he was just always there with his unconditional love. So he was my inspiration for as long as I can remember.  

Ever since I lost him... I lost  little spark in my life... its hard to explain. Its almost like a little bit of energy has gone from my body and I dont know how to get it back. But maybe its good and fair that I feel that way... maybe Im never supposed to find that spark again. Maybe when he died... he took that spark with him. He took that little part of me with him... and I can never get that back.

But you know what... I want him to have it!!! Its his to keep forever... a special part of my heart that only ever existed in the first place... cus he was in my life. So maybe he always owned it to begin with...

And thats ok with me... just as long as he knows... Ive also got a special part of him that Im never gonna give back too :-)

TEX yr STILL with me mate!!