a simple Thank You is all you need sometimes...NO WORRIES JANETTE :-)
30 November, 2009
19 November, 2009
Travel Agents guide to Sydney...
Travel advice is something I'd normally charge good money for. But because I love ya's all... or more to the point... am just trying to take my mind off other shit tonight... here is your own Happy Traveller Guide to Sydney!!! Im sure you've already read the reviews and seen all the brochures. But please... allow me :-p
DO- sit on the LHS of the plane as you're flying into Sydney... you'll get a great view of the city if you approach from the west. For any Americans... that funny shaped white thing is the Opera House. This is where we train our wombats to sing.
DONT- say "Goodday Mate"... seriously its one of those things if you pronounce it wrong you just sound like a special unit. Its "gday mate" (pronounced ged-aay). Say it right and we'll love ya to death :-)
DO- book yourself a city tour... good value in any city. If your American... this is a good time to keep an eye out for Kangaroos bou
ncing around the city. If you're really lucky you may even see one driving a taxi... or having a beer. And for the love of god... will you please learn how to pronounce Melbourne. Honestly whats so hard about it... everyone else can pronounce it properly... its MEL--BURN... not MEL-BOOORN. Cmon sing it with me baby!!!
DO- climb the Sydney Harbour Bridge if you are not scared of heights. Its absolutely fantastic but a real hike to the top. It takes 2 hours from memory and is quiet steep. Be a little careful if you're American though... because we sometimes like to throw you guys off the top of the bridge just for shits and giggle and to amuse ourself
DO- go to Darling Harbour for a night... it is set against the backdrop of the city skyline right on the water and has an uber exciting vibe. There is so much to do... endless street shows, shopping, IMAX, the Aquarium... plus Star City Casino is only a stones throw away. There are a few really good clubs and cocktail lounges (www.pontoonbar.com)
there too if you feel like partying it up Sydney style. I'd highly recommend staying in this part of the city and I'd highly recommend The Novotel @ Darling Harbour for a reasonably priced mid range hotel. It has a perfect location right on the waterfront with Darling Harbours entertainment literally at your doorstep. Plus the hotel has a monorail station (the cylindrical purple thing in the pic) just outside the main lobby
which makes it a great base for exploring the rest of the city. The rooms aren't huge... so if your budget allows it upgrade to a cityview room... they are slightly bigger and have a cosy balcony perfect for an evening nightcap and views of the city skyline you'll never forget.
-----
DO- go to The Rocks if you want a MASSIVE night out... its more hectic than Darling Harbour with plenty of good Pubs and that sort of thing. Cover charge at the door is $10-$15 and its at EVERY pub. But our doorman have been known from time to time to charge $30 for Americans... so my advice to you guys is lie and say your Canadian. There... dont say I dont do anything for ya's LOL
-----
DONT- forget the Botanic Gardens... like anything in Sydney it twists its way around the Harbour and is a great pla
ce to relax for a bit. There are many walking paths you can choose from or you can even ride a bicucle there. Pack a picnic lunch... hire a bicycle and find yourself a big old shady tree
-----
DONT- tip... its honestly not our culture. Barstaff & waitresses are all earning $20 an hour upwards so nobody expects a tip. Exception being if you get exceptionaly good service... or you think the bargirl/barman is uber hot... thats the only time we tip. Of course different rules apply for Americans... for you tipping ettiquiette in Australia is the same as the USA... 10% if you're good looking or 15% if you've been hit with the ugly stick.
----
DO- check out the view from Centrepoint Tower... there is a nice revolving restuarant at the summit for fine diners... dont expect much change from $150 for a seafood buffet. There is also plenty of nice places to grab a bite to eat down on the water near the Opera House
-----
DONT- tell any Steve Irwin jokes... its the only thing we get sensitive about. If you're American and disrespect him then our pet Kangaroos will box your head in. The man is a legend... we all love him to death. He's our version of Ghandi
-----
DONT- ask us how to throw a boomerang... we have no f*$%@* idea. I bought one a few years ago just to see if it'd work... I almost killed 3 people. Only the aborginals know how to throw them. And they wont tell ua LOL
-----
DO- definately definetly do... an evening harbour cruise. The harbour at night is amazing. Think Hon
g Kong... but give it a Aussie flavour and crank up the excitement level 200% and you'll get an idea of what its like. Anyway seeing the city sights from the harbour itself is something special. The boats are sleek and modern and all have huge decks where you can drink and eat the night away while cruising past our most famous sights... you even get to go under the Harbour Bridge. The food is good and theres plenty of drinks and fun to be had Highly recommended :-)
-----
DO- if you have a coupla hours to burn and just wanna relax... catch a train across the
Harbour Bridge to Milsons Point... its the first station after the bridge on the north side of the city. Wander outside to the grassed area directly under the Harbour Bridge. There is a little Italian Pizza shop there... grab a girl... preferably yours... and a pizza and just relax on the grass at sunset. Its an real peaceful spot... theres hardly any cars there. In fact if I didnt tell you... you'd probably never find it. Its a favourite little spot for us locals to just chill out... nice 'n' relaxing with uninterrupted views of the Opera House plus Luna Park is only a short 2 minute stroll across the road.
-----
DO- check out Bondi Beach... it wont blow your mind for sheer beauty...
trust me we have better. Dont get me wrong... its still a nice beach but Bondi is more than just a beach. Its a awesome part of the city... very laid back with a beach-side promonande that is filled with trendy cafes, cool shops and some really good beer gardens. Us locals go there more to just chill out... if we want to swim we'll go someplace else... theres soo 
many tourists there... backpackers galore. You'll see more cameras on Bondi than bikinis. But please... pretty please with vegemite on top... be careful of the surf. Of course we have the Sharks too... the Great Whites... and yes they can get kinda big... like small car big. But no... we dont fearlessly tackle them in the water... like you we totally shit our pants and swim back to the beach ASAP. Anyhoo they only eat the Americans so everyone else is safe.
-----
DO- try to get out of the city for a coupla nights. If you're after somewhere nice and uber uber relaxing to stay... try a quaint little town called Huskisson... or Husky to us. This IS a nice beach... better than anything you will find in the
city and probably the best beach you've never heard of. Its an easy 2 hour drive south of Sydney and has a gorgeous little town with dolphins in the ocean. There are some cool ice cream cafes... a nice little pub with outdoor beer garden overlooking the ocean... its perfect. Plus you can rent little pedal powered (Flinestones) glass bottom boats and go cruising around the bay. Rent a beach-cabin for the weekend for a nice change of pace from the city.
-----
DONT- forget to drop in and see me on the way back from
Husky for a sunday afternoon BBQ... you cant leave Down Under without having a Barbie and a Beer. I promise I wont put vegemite on your steak... unless of course... need I even say it... you're American. In which case not only will get you get marinated vegemite steak... but also a free ride back to the airport on my pet kangaroo. His name is Fluffy and he smokes cigarettes same as me. I think you will like him... he's a lot nicer than the sharks.
I truly hope that my country extends you the courtesy... and friendliness... that your country has given me over the years :-)
WELCOME TO SYDNEY :-)
DO- sit on the LHS of the plane as you're flying into Sydney... you'll get a great view of the city if you approach from the west. For any Americans... that funny shaped white thing is the Opera House. This is where we train our wombats to sing.
DONT- say "Goodday Mate"... seriously its one of those things if you pronounce it wrong you just sound like a special unit. Its "gday mate" (pronounced ged-aay). Say it right and we'll love ya to death :-)
DO- book yourself a city tour... good value in any city. If your American... this is a good time to keep an eye out for Kangaroos bou
ncing around the city. If you're really lucky you may even see one driving a taxi... or having a beer. And for the love of god... will you please learn how to pronounce Melbourne. Honestly whats so hard about it... everyone else can pronounce it properly... its MEL--BURN... not MEL-BOOORN. Cmon sing it with me baby!!! DO- climb the Sydney Harbour Bridge if you are not scared of heights. Its absolutely fantastic but a real hike to the top. It takes 2 hours from memory and is quiet steep. Be a little careful if you're American though... because we sometimes like to throw you guys off the top of the bridge just for shits and giggle and to amuse ourself
DO- go to Darling Harbour for a night... it is set against the backdrop of the city skyline right on the water and has an uber exciting vibe. There is so much to do... endless street shows, shopping, IMAX, the Aquarium... plus Star City Casino is only a stones throw away. There are a few really good clubs and cocktail lounges (www.pontoonbar.com)
there too if you feel like partying it up Sydney style. I'd highly recommend staying in this part of the city and I'd highly recommend The Novotel @ Darling Harbour for a reasonably priced mid range hotel. It has a perfect location right on the waterfront with Darling Harbours entertainment literally at your doorstep. Plus the hotel has a monorail station (the cylindrical purple thing in the pic) just outside the main lobby
which makes it a great base for exploring the rest of the city. The rooms aren't huge... so if your budget allows it upgrade to a cityview room... they are slightly bigger and have a cosy balcony perfect for an evening nightcap and views of the city skyline you'll never forget.-----
DO- go to The Rocks if you want a MASSIVE night out... its more hectic than Darling Harbour with plenty of good Pubs and that sort of thing. Cover charge at the door is $10-$15 and its at EVERY pub. But our doorman have been known from time to time to charge $30 for Americans... so my advice to you guys is lie and say your Canadian. There... dont say I dont do anything for ya's LOL
-----
DONT- forget the Botanic Gardens... like anything in Sydney it twists its way around the Harbour and is a great pla
ce to relax for a bit. There are many walking paths you can choose from or you can even ride a bicucle there. Pack a picnic lunch... hire a bicycle and find yourself a big old shady tree -----
DONT- tip... its honestly not our culture. Barstaff & waitresses are all earning $20 an hour upwards so nobody expects a tip. Exception being if you get exceptionaly good service... or you think the bargirl/barman is uber hot... thats the only time we tip. Of course different rules apply for Americans... for you tipping ettiquiette in Australia is the same as the USA... 10% if you're good looking or 15% if you've been hit with the ugly stick.
----
DO- check out the view from Centrepoint Tower... there is a nice revolving restuarant at the summit for fine diners... dont expect much change from $150 for a seafood buffet. There is also plenty of nice places to grab a bite to eat down on the water near the Opera House
-----
DONT- tell any Steve Irwin jokes... its the only thing we get sensitive about. If you're American and disrespect him then our pet Kangaroos will box your head in. The man is a legend... we all love him to death. He's our version of Ghandi
-----
DONT- ask us how to throw a boomerang... we have no f*$%@* idea. I bought one a few years ago just to see if it'd work... I almost killed 3 people. Only the aborginals know how to throw them. And they wont tell ua LOL
-----
DO- definately definetly do... an evening harbour cruise. The harbour at night is amazing. Think Hon
g Kong... but give it a Aussie flavour and crank up the excitement level 200% and you'll get an idea of what its like. Anyway seeing the city sights from the harbour itself is something special. The boats are sleek and modern and all have huge decks where you can drink and eat the night away while cruising past our most famous sights... you even get to go under the Harbour Bridge. The food is good and theres plenty of drinks and fun to be had Highly recommended :-)-----
DO- if you have a coupla hours to burn and just wanna relax... catch a train across the
Harbour Bridge to Milsons Point... its the first station after the bridge on the north side of the city. Wander outside to the grassed area directly under the Harbour Bridge. There is a little Italian Pizza shop there... grab a girl... preferably yours... and a pizza and just relax on the grass at sunset. Its an real peaceful spot... theres hardly any cars there. In fact if I didnt tell you... you'd probably never find it. Its a favourite little spot for us locals to just chill out... nice 'n' relaxing with uninterrupted views of the Opera House plus Luna Park is only a short 2 minute stroll across the road.-----
DO- check out Bondi Beach... it wont blow your mind for sheer beauty...
trust me we have better. Dont get me wrong... its still a nice beach but Bondi is more than just a beach. Its a awesome part of the city... very laid back with a beach-side promonande that is filled with trendy cafes, cool shops and some really good beer gardens. Us locals go there more to just chill out... if we want to swim we'll go someplace else... theres soo 
many tourists there... backpackers galore. You'll see more cameras on Bondi than bikinis. But please... pretty please with vegemite on top... be careful of the surf. Of course we have the Sharks too... the Great Whites... and yes they can get kinda big... like small car big. But no... we dont fearlessly tackle them in the water... like you we totally shit our pants and swim back to the beach ASAP. Anyhoo they only eat the Americans so everyone else is safe.-----
DO- try to get out of the city for a coupla nights. If you're after somewhere nice and uber uber relaxing to stay... try a quaint little town called Huskisson... or Husky to us. This IS a nice beach... better than anything you will find in the
city and probably the best beach you've never heard of. Its an easy 2 hour drive south of Sydney and has a gorgeous little town with dolphins in the ocean. There are some cool ice cream cafes... a nice little pub with outdoor beer garden overlooking the ocean... its perfect. Plus you can rent little pedal powered (Flinestones) glass bottom boats and go cruising around the bay. Rent a beach-cabin for the weekend for a nice change of pace from the city.-----
DONT- forget to drop in and see me on the way back from
Husky for a sunday afternoon BBQ... you cant leave Down Under without having a Barbie and a Beer. I promise I wont put vegemite on your steak... unless of course... need I even say it... you're American. In which case not only will get you get marinated vegemite steak... but also a free ride back to the airport on my pet kangaroo. His name is Fluffy and he smokes cigarettes same as me. I think you will like him... he's a lot nicer than the sharks. I truly hope that my country extends you the courtesy... and friendliness... that your country has given me over the years :-)
WELCOME TO SYDNEY :-)
Ahhh Screw It....
Im BACK!!! Ok what can I say I missed writing my own blog. Stupid blog. Another f%*&!! modern technology addiction to go along with Facebook and MSN Chat...
Then there was MySpace... remember that? God I was the last of all my friends to join... and then BAM... Facebook comes along. Now there is this Twitter thing too. Plus faxes, emails, phones ARGHHHH its too much! Seriously... can the entire planet please settle on 1 form of cyber-communication and STICK WITH IT.
Sometimes I just feel like moving to a remote mountain village in Mongolia an
d becoming a Yak herder... what an easy life that would be!!! I could spend my days pimping out my Yak instead of my Facebook page... you know give him a mo-hawk... maybe paint him blue or someting. Then sit around a campfire at night with other Yak herders drinking locally brewed wine from fermented Yak shit... and chatting about whatever it is Yak herders like to chat about. Yeah that sounds perfect right about now. Well at least it would be until one of them pulls out their laptop and logs into Facebook... LOL. Ahhhh f'kenell... there is just no escape.
Yeah had a week I wanna forget... pulled a lady from a car-wreck on Saturday night and then a good mate's brothers wife was killed on Sunday. Walking the dog.
Walking the fucking dog.
RIP Kylie
where ever you are.....
Then there was MySpace... remember that? God I was the last of all my friends to join... and then BAM... Facebook comes along. Now there is this Twitter thing too. Plus faxes, emails, phones ARGHHHH its too much! Seriously... can the entire planet please settle on 1 form of cyber-communication and STICK WITH IT.
Sometimes I just feel like moving to a remote mountain village in Mongolia an
d becoming a Yak herder... what an easy life that would be!!! I could spend my days pimping out my Yak instead of my Facebook page... you know give him a mo-hawk... maybe paint him blue or someting. Then sit around a campfire at night with other Yak herders drinking locally brewed wine from fermented Yak shit... and chatting about whatever it is Yak herders like to chat about. Yeah that sounds perfect right about now. Well at least it would be until one of them pulls out their laptop and logs into Facebook... LOL. Ahhhh f'kenell... there is just no escape.Yeah had a week I wanna forget... pulled a lady from a car-wreck on Saturday night and then a good mate's brothers wife was killed on Sunday. Walking the dog.
Walking the fucking dog.
RIP Kylie
where ever you are.....
05 November, 2009
01 November, 2009
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